FYI.

This story is over 5 years old.

Stuff

Cry-Baby of the Week

This week: Outraged 'Human Centipede' mother versus Oreo homophobes.

Let's all LOL in the faces of a couple of whiney wimps again!

Cry-baby #1: Fearn Cranston

(via)

The incident: A woman's 12-year-old son somehow ended up watching the trailer for The Human Centipede at his school.

The appropriate reaction: Nothing. Maybe, if he wanted to see it on the basis of the trailer, telling him that it's not worth it 'cause the full movie fucking sucks (it really, really does).

Annons

The actual reaction: As always with the people featured in this column, she sold her story to The Sun. Not that her story is even really a story. The headline says "SICK HORROR FLICK SHOWN TO CLASS OF 12-YEAR-OLDS". Which, obviously, would suggest a horror film was shown to a class of children. What actually happened was this:

"A teacher at The Regis School in Bognor Regis, West Sussex, had allowed the youngsters to watch a video from YouTube using an interactive white board.

"But when a pupil selected the trailer from sick horror flick The Human Centipede, the children sat and watched a frightening clip of a mad scientist chasing down innocent victims."

The trailer. The fucking trailer. And it was selected by a pupil. And look at mum's fucking face! She phoned the school to complain, too: "I phoned the school and they called me back apologising but it’s not good enough."

Which begs the question: What would be good enough? The class were "left terrified", apparently.

Isn't sitting around and showing each other gross shit from the internet what 12-year-olds have been doing all day at school since the invention of smart-phones? I'm pretty sure her son is going to find it a lot more traumatic when the kids from school see this and he is literally bullied out of existence.

Cry-baby #2: One Million Moms and Other American Internet Homophobes

(via)

The incident: To celebrate the fact that it's OK to advertise to gay people now, Oreo posted the above image to their Facebook.

Annons

The appropriate reaction: Clicking "Like" on it if you like it. Otherwise, nothing.

The actual reaction: Predictably, as this story involves America, the internet and gay stuff, people lost their fucking minds. Here's a sampling of some of the comments the post recieved:

Eugh. Those professional trolls Millions of Moms (the ones who got all annoyed about Ellen a few months ago) did something, too. But I don't wanna give them a hit by looking on their site to see what it was. So who knows.

So who is the biggest cry-baby? Let us know in the poll below so that we can shame one of these self-serious pussies forever:

Who is the bigger cry-baby?

Previously: Brooklyn Water Balloon Hating Mom VS. That Kid From the Placebo Album Cover

Winner: Brooklyn Water Balloon Hating Mom!!

Follow Jamie on Twitter: @JLCT