I recognise a lot from my own teenage years in the show. I remember the pre-parties in IKEA-furnished bedrooms, drinking bring-along beer and listening to Britney's auto-tuned robotic vocals moaning "Gimme More" in the Sony Micro Stereo. I remember it all so clearly, and I have great memories from my three years in high school. However, I don't miss all that. So what the hell is that deep, nostalgic feeling I get every time I watch the show?Besides all the recognisable stuff, there is a certain part of the teenage experience as portrayed in SKAM, which I never got to experience myself. I didn't date anyone in high school. The closest I got to dating was when the guy I was in love with broke my heart in the parking lot at a fancy dress party, while I was wearing a Mr. Incredible costume. Other than that proud moment, life in high school was always about someone else's drama – dating related or not. To me, all the flirting, fucking and jealousy felt like a party I wasn't invited to. There was always a friend, who had a problem with another friend. (Why was it always at the peak of the party that they had to "talk things through"?) If not that, it was my best friend who would sail off on a soul-draining, gut-wrenching emotional free fall, every time there was a girl who didn't wanna hook up with him. I always played my part as the supportive friend with pride and joy, while secretly wishing that for once, the drama could be about me.
I didn't date anyone in high school. The closest I got to dating was when the guy I was in love with broke my heart in the parking lot at a fancy dress party, while I was wearing a Mr. Incredible costume.
Flash forward about eight years: I'm on my couch in my underwear and socks, staring intensely at my 13 inch Macbook Pro. There's ten minutes left of the season one finale. Eva lets Jonas into her house. Last time they spoke, he said she shouldn't contact him before figuring out who she is. Burn. Now she's invited him over and they're having tea in the kitchen, so she must have figured something out, right? Maybe they will get back together or are they going to break up? Before we get to that, I'm treated to strong one of the greatest characteristics of teenage drama – the lustful stare while the other person looks away. Then Eva talks:"Do you remember the first time we kissed?"This is textbook stuff. The two lovers reignite their flame by telling each other the story of how they first got together. I've seen that a million times before. But not like this. Eva goes on to tell Jonas how she became "insecure and desperate" because Jonas's opinion became more important than her own, and that she now needs to form her own opinion and find herself – without him.Surprisingly enough it's not corny at all. This is not Brenda Walsh with her resting bitch face covered in stone washed denim in the halls of West Beverly High. I believe it. I feel it because I'm right up in there with the tears, the skin imperfections, and the running eyeliner. I'm the one kissing Eva. And Jonas. And both of them at the same time. And that's why I'm tearing up when Eva's monologue reveals that she's breaking up with Jonas, and the flash forward cut-aways are leading to break-up sex instead of make-up sex as I expected. I remember this feeling – even though I was convinced it was reserved for everyone but me back then.
I'm the one kissing Eva. And Jonas. And both of them at the same time.