Photo courtesy of Dannidaniels.com
Annons
Annons
Danni Daniels: When I was 16 or 17, I started doing modeling, editorial stuff. I was in Vogue and a lot of big fashion magazines, but then I started getting tattooed and transitioning and both those things were conflicting with my modeling agency. I was gaining weight and my agency was saying, "You're getting fat, you're getting too alternative, we can't book you for this." When you're on transitional hormones, you're on enough hormones for a pregnant woman with twins. Because of that, I was starving all the time and pissed off. For someone to tell me to stop eating so much, it was like, "If you get between me and my food, I will kill you." So I left.I started working behind the scenes in theater. When the Broadway show I was working on was about to end its run, I started having panic attacks. My mentor also had a panic disorder, and she really helped me learn how to deal with anxiety. But then, right when the show closed, she went through my purse without my knowledge, stole my Xanax, and downed the whole bottle of it and killed herself. So the person who helped me find my place was now gone.I had offers to go into the adult industry before that, but at that point, I just wanted to do something that would be liberating and get me out of New York. Also, I had a real fear of flying and traveling. When I feel that way, I always want to just do the thing that scares me. It ended up turning into a six-year, glorified, homeless adventure.
Annons
In your more recent work, you are topping cisgendered men. Was that always the case? Did you ever have sex with cisgendered women or trans men and women on camera?My sexuality is a very private and very intimate thing for me. I tell people what you see on camera is an act. It would be like walking up to Robert Downey, Jr. and saying, 'Oh my God, you're Iron Man.' —Danni Daniels
I used porn as a way to discover my sexuality and where I fell on the spectrum. I've always been a sexual person, but the adult film industry really helped me clarify what I wanted in life. I exposed myself to as much as possible—all genders, all sexualities, any time something new came up, that was exciting for me. But I now know that I'm a straight, trans woman. I need dick in my life.A lot of people do.
But when you go outside your sexuality in the adult film industry, you need to train your body to work as a tool. I would say porn helped me center myself and work through other issues that weren't even related, just because I was able to apply such a level of control to my mind and body. And being in a professional setting where I was able to be with people who had the same mindset of this being work allowed me to have a nonjudgmental space for my sexuality.But my sexuality is far different from the sexuality I portray on camera, almost a stark contrast to what is seen on film. My sexuality is a very private and very intimate thing for me. I tell people what you see on camera is an act—enjoy it, but it isn't me. It would be like walking up to Robert Downey, Jr. and saying, "Oh my God, you're Iron Man." It's like, no.
Annons
So when you are working with people you aren't interested in, how do you stay hard? Do you take Viagra?I had tits and a dick and was tattooed and alternative, and I could come over and over again on camera.—Danni Daniels
When I started filming one on one with another woman without another male involved, there was no way I could stay hard without some assistance. But my first three years in the industry, I refused to take erectile drugs. Because I would see these guys who would go from Viagra to Cialis to mixing Viagra and Cialis, and then they'd go right to injecting drugs into their penises because their bodies would get used to the less powerful drugs.Did having a penis feel like it conflicted with or fit with your gender identity?
Walking into the porn industry with a nine-inch dick was gold. It gave me confidence and made it so that I didn't have to work really hard. I just had to show up, get naked, and I was praised for it. I had tits and a dick and was tattooed and alternative, and I could come over and over again on camera. So I was a niche within a niche within a niche, and it allowed me to be more creative and more picky and selective with what I did and who I worked with.
When you are seen as a submissive on camera, the production company treats you as a submissive in life. They start thinking, You are just a hole, and you're going to take whatever we give you. —Danni Daniels
Annons
Oh yeah. If you are a submissive genetic woman or submissive trans, you get treated like shit. You get treated like an object. I can't tell you how many people offered me tons of money to be passive. They were like, "We'll give you $10,000 (€9,000) grand to be passive." I'd have done it for $50,000 (€45,000). I still will. If someone were to call me and say, "I'll give you $50,000 grand to destroy you on camera," I'd be like, "Where do I sign?"So if you were submissive just once, would your value in the industry drop?
Yeah, that would be the end of my career. Because then I would be treated differently. That's when I would be getting the calls where they would say they could only pay me half of what I requested. When you are seen as a submissive on camera, the production company treats you as a submissive in life. They start thinking, You are just a hole, and you're going to take whatever we give you.Is that true for submissive men?
With submissive men, it's a different animal, because there is a line out the goddamn door of men who are applying for submission. I'm talking hundreds a day. So they get paid nothing just because so many men want to do it.
How do you maintain a separation between your porn sexuality and your private sexuality?If someone were to call me and say, 'I'll give you $50,000 to destroy you on camera,' I'd be like, 'Where do I sign?' —Danni Daniels
I identify as a trans woman and my partner accepts and treats me as a trans woman. But there are so many guys out there who will start a relationship with a trans woman under the pretense of wanting to treat them as a woman. But later on down the line, they will weasel their way into being a sub. I can't even count how many times this scenario has played out. And a lot of trans women don't know what they want until it happens to them. A lot of times it really screws with their head, like, "What am I, and what does this mean for my life and my sexuality?"
Annons
It's become really convoluted and taken away a lot of the freedoms that would make you comfortable. There's so many forms to fill out now and everything is taxed, so you don't get paid in cash anymore and you have to report everything.
Annons
I still do my thing with my site and my company, and I love them. It's mostly solo stuff, not scenes.And does that feel good because you are controlling it?
Oh yeah, it relaxes you completely. It's like, It's mine, it's my baby, people are still paying for it. And it's also making it more exclusive. It's driving traffic to me, and I'm getting all the profits, as opposed to it being directed through three or four other companies. And I really only do solo scenes when I want to. I don't feel obligated to, which is great. It allows me to produce material I really want to produce and just be proud of putting my name on everything that I do.Follow Amy on Twitter.