Good Morning Sinners
The Inexorable Rise of the Crapjects
How Google's glasses, Apple's iWatch and the things you'll churn out of your 3D printer will soon have us drowning in pointless shit.
Losing My Internet Connection Is Like Going Deaf
How a guy in a hotel room watching porn cut me off from the future.
My Bloody Valentine, Bowie and the URL of Things to Come
The future of the arts has been here for a while, but now even your dad can't ignore it.
I'm Sick of Waiting for Space Travel, Give Me a Castle On Mars Now
And while you're at it, make sure the castle's a bouncy one.
In Which I Fix Gun Control in America
Ladies and gentlemen who can't bear the thought of not having guns, it's time to introduce The People's Drone Fleet of America.
Delete Everything Now
In the future, Mickey Mouse will juggle all your sins and weaknesses in his big, mutant hands.
Sandy and the Broken Machine
Global warming isn't a joke or a trick, it's the new future, a thousand miles wide and coming for us at a hundred miles an hour.
My Last Column About the Presidential Election (Really)
It'll appear to be tight, but it really won't be. Here's my prediction.
Jimmy Savile and the Price of Silence
Maybe he'd have been caught sooner if anyone was prepared to pay it.