Don't Do It

Even a nervous system nuked by meth abuse, Trichinella spiralis, and head trauma still responds to the stimulus “Just Do It.” Like margarine on a Thomas’ English muffin, the marketing campaign has penetrated every nook and cranny of the global economy. Male Trobriand Islanders now have the slogan tattooed on their nuts at age 13 as a rite of passage. No one is innocent.

Though the words sound like an invitation to libertinism along the lines of “Do what thou Wilt shall be the whole of the Law,” Nike’s ads make it clear that the slogan doesn’t mean enjoying sex, drugs, music, or ultraviolence. It means cold dominating in the wholesome athletic endeavor of your choice: “Just Kick It,” “Just Bounce It.” A study of the ad campaign by the management consulting firm Center for Applied Research recounts Nike’s own folk tale about the slogan’s origin. According to the company’s story, the slogan “was coined at a 1988 meeting of Nike’s ad agency, Wieden + Kennedy, and a group of Nike employees. Dan Wieden, speaking admiringly of Nike’s can-do attitude, reportedly said, "You Nike guys, you just do it.”

The same year that historic ad agency meeting took place, a group dedicated to wholesome athletic endeavor released an album called Do It. The second Rollins Band LP comprised one side of studio recordings produced by Ian MacKaye and one side of live recordings from a show in Holland. The first of the three cover songs that made up side one was a version of the Pink Fairies’ “Do It.” “Don’t think about it—DO IT! Don’t talk about it—DO IT! Don’t lie about it—DO IT! DO IT! Write about it honey, that’s no good, you just DO IT! DO IT! Yeah! D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-DO IT!” et cetera. Like motivational speakers and certain evangelists, Henry wants you to succeed.

Perhaps the only group that dared contradict this nationwide chorus of affirmation was Big Fun, the opportunist pop band in Heathers (1988) who sang “Teenage Suicide (Don’t Do It).” Apparently there are some things you shouldn’t do, and Big Fun put the emphasis on those things. However, both the Rollins Band's exhortation and Big Fun's warning discouraged drug use. For the Rollins Band, who encouraged you to do it, doing it didn’t mean getting fucked up, but for Big Fun, who warned you not to do it, doing it meant just that: “Drugs and alcohol don’t mix.”

“Do It” originally came out as the B-side of the Pink Fairies’ first single, “The Snake.” The Pink Fairies, comrades of Hawkwind, were so fucked up they could barely see. They placed zero value on success. During the summer of 1970, the band played outside the Isle of Wight festival in protest of things that cost money, and at the free Phun City fest they got naked onstage. “The Snake” b/w “Do It” was released in 1971, the same year graphic designer Carolyn Davidson created the “swoosh” logo that she sold to Nike for $35.