Maggie Kelly

  • Hey Internet Daters, Grow Some Balls

    I’ve never really understood dating. Occasionally, when I’m hormonal or between jobs, I’ll give it a shot—but generally speaking, I think being single is the fucking prize.

  • Thanks, America, But You Can Have The Madden Brothers Back Now

    The first band I saw live was Blink 182. It was at the Brisbane Entertainment Centre when I was 14 years old. I loved Blink 182. I wanted to marry, dry hump, kiss-on-the-lips-but-no-tongue Blink 182. As a result, the only thing I felt for their rivals...