Why Sports Help
There is nothing out there on the internet, nothing useful to learn about the Boston bombings, only more of the guilty inertia that leads us to put this shit on in the background in the first place. There’s nothing here for us, at the moment. So I’m...
Meet the Satire Called the Mets
Mets fans are not notably smarter or dumber, more or less entitled, or even sadder than the fans of any other flailing team. But thanks to their owners, the Wilpon family, the team's narrative is less a standard Shitty Owner Ruins Team story and more...
Why Does Anyone Watch Baseball?
A baseball fan and a non-fan chat about whether being bored by baseball is bad, whether the sport is doomed to become the next hockey, and speeding the three-hour games up. And also Terrmel Sledge.
The Nationals Are a Real Baseball Team Now, a Homeless Guy Said So
The Washington Nationals are 100 percent for real. They exist. They are good. How good? Even homeless people in ass-backwards Chicago know about them.
Screw Bud Selig, Screw Hypocrisy, and Screw You
God bless America. This is the land of getting over. The land of second or even third chances; the land of doing whatever you have to do by any means necessary in order to fulfill the American Dream. I thought about all this while pouring a tall and...
We Saw the ESPN Bo Jackson Documentary and It Ruled
I went to a screening of ESPN's documentary about Bo Jackson, one of the most incredible athletes of all time. What he did in his short, unearthly career is captured better here than it has been anywhere else. You should watch it.
In some ways, the Miami Marlins are Florida—overleveraged, overbuilt, and cruising blithely towards foreclosure while being ruled by a clownish, childish, tone-deaf, permanent cadre of special-needs elites. Less metaphorically, they’re a fucking bummer.
The Day the Running Stopped
This past week in sports saw the New York Marathon appropriately cancelled in the wake of Hurricane Sandy, the NBA regular season kicked off, baseball free agency started and some important college football games.
Champions and Winners
The two teams playing in the World Series are not, objectively and subjectively and quite predictably, the two best teams in baseball. They are the most momentum-fortified, or the luckiest, teams in baseball at the moment, and one of them—at the moment...
Did the Red Sox Beat the Yankees?
Both the Yankees and Red Sox have had disappointing seasons, but does the future look better for Boston? Considering how old and injured the Yankees are, it does.
Who do you root for if you don't have a team in the postseason? While there are no wrong answers to this question (except for "the Yankees"), if you're not cheering for the Oakland Athletics, you're probably a jerk.
Baseball Is Basically a Random Number Generator
Baseball is too random to predict games, and even more so in October, when things get so tense you can puke.