jesus

  • Jason Collins Shook a Few Bigots Out of the Homophobe Tree

    Jason Collins made his big “I'm gay” announcement last week. Big news like this can't help but be met with a vocal minority of the religious-minded seeing this as a “test” from the man upstairs, and the only way they'll pass is by letting their...

  • Please Stop Believing

    I like to think of myself as an equal-opportunity offender, that all religions are just different sides of the same million-or-so-headed coin to me. The specifics of what ancient person has what magic power according to whatever secret text is simply a...

  • The Ravens Are God's Favorites

    Fifty-three percent of Americans think God rewards athletes who believe in Him with good health and great success. In other words, yesterday, God chose his most-loved, and by default his most-hated, Harbaugh brother.

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  • Catholic Guilt Ruined My Sex Life

    He told me about his strict Catholic upbringing and how it was sinful for us to be having sex out of wedlock, and that his mother would “die” if she ever found out. I was the second girl he’d ever slept with, but he still made me feel cheap.

  • Adios, Choice

    Remove the clinics, put insurmountable obstacles in the way, and Roe v. Wade will soon hold as much power as the now-hilariously-shortsighted Third Amendment. The fight for abortion is almost over, and pro-lifers are nearly the victors.

  • Darren Cullen Says Santa Is Stealing Jesus's Thunder

    Darren Cullen’s work does a good job of continually outraging the conservative press, who often use terms like “disturbing,” “grotesque,” and “freakish horror show” to describe his art. But they’re all clearly just right-wing stupid-heads who don’t...

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  • The Longest Horoscope Ever

    The Bible has been able to spoil so much of human history because it is just is so fucking vague. Want to sleep with your little cousin? Surely there's something in there that'd give you the thumbs up.

  • Who Would Win in a Fight: Jesus, Muhammad, Ganesh, or Buddha?

    People spend a fortune to see average humans beat the living crap out of each other. Think about how entertaining it would be to watch gods duke it out to the death. If we put Christ, the Prophet, Ganesh, and Buddah in steel cage, who would walk out...

  • Happy JesusWeen, Everyone!

    Imagine kids with close-cropped hair and conservative clothes coming to the door, the homeowners offering candy, and the children pushing that aside and instead offering up a stack of Bibles.

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  • Watch This Hero

    When you first start listening to Preacher Phil Snider's speech on gay marriage, you'll probably want to duck out because he sounds like a hateful lunatic who thinks that gays and pedophiles are cut from the same cloth. But stick it out, it's worth it.

  • God Vs. The Ladies

    The original scriptures—the template which has led to today's incarnation of religion—were written by men during a time when women were property and mystical beasts who occasionally farted out children. This factoid explains the troubling inherent...

  • Which Religious Idol Would You Get Drunk With?

    The idols worshipped by the idol-worshipping portion of the world’s population used to be human beings who walked around, got colds, shat in pots, and even got drunk.