A Small Minority of Idiots
An Ode to Phil Jones, Football's Gurning, Well-Meaning Stuntman
The magnificent clumsiness of Manchester United's least cultured centre-back.
Internet Football Trolls Have Found a New Way to Torment Richard Keys
#BringAndyBack is a cruel master-stroke in banterific Keys-baiting.
What I've Learnt from Meeting Lee Chapman, Pelé and Other Footballing Heroes
I got drunk with my childhood hero on the King's Road in 2009. Pelé, I met last week.
Five Things We Learned From This Weekend’s Football
A false dawn for Manchester United, and a sad end to Burnley. In non-north west news: Newcastle are awful.
Five Reasons to Watch Football This Weekend
It's getting fun down near the bottom of the table. Up top: mostly meaningless.
Five Reasons to Watch Football This Weekend
The title race is over, so tune in to the real game of the season: Tim Sherwood FC vs. Liverpool
The Ballad of Steve Bruce: Premier League Punching Bag
Another season of the Hull City manager will soon have passed: a comfortingly familiar sack of puffed-out cheeks, rueful sighs and inevitable negative goal difference.
Last Night the Football League Show Saved My Life
It's actually the best show on TV, if you let it be.
We Need to Talk About Carl Jenkinson
Why Carl Jenkinson – decent right back, shit fisherman, Arsenal megafan – needs to come back where he belongs.
Six Things We Learned from This Weekend's Football
Newcastle are doomed in ways you couldn't possibly imagine.
Abou Diaby and My Fetish for Non-Playing Players
Stuart Taylor. Pegguy Arpexhad. Stuart Taylor. Where are you?
Five Things We Learned from This Weekend's Football
Surely only the giddiest of Arsenal fans are fantasising over a late title push?