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Babes of the BNP

Just so you don’t think we’re singling out the bobos of the American political fringe, here’s a series of short, informative interviews our UK office did with

You no longer need to be a hatchet-faced National Front refugee to join the whites-only club. The fascist menace no longer wears jackboots. It no longer flags down the number 25 bus with a hearty "Sieg Heil". Nope, ours is a new, gentler, more airbrushed age. Feminism's here, so now girls can dig race hate too. As the BNP's attempts to reposition itself as a mainstream party have advanced its perimeter far beyond the usual crewcuts-n-tats brigade, we spoke to three of the more acceptable new faces of the unacceptable. What a bunch of hotties! Phwoar! Makes you aroused to be British.

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Rebecca Edwards
Manchester

Vice: How old are you?
Rebecca: 23.

What do you do for a living?
I'm a full-time mum.

What first attracted you to the BNP?
My husband. He's been in the army for twelve years, and when I met him four years ago, he actually told me about the BNP and what they were doing. And from then on, I started to support them.

Are most of your friends BNP?
Yeah. Not particularly the people in our area, but our friends are.

When people say the BNP is a fascist party, what do you think?
Fascist – I don't understand that word.

Think of Nazi Germany, or 1930s Italy.
I can't even remember when that happened really, but I'm against them anyway.

You're against who?
The Germans. I know that sounds evil… I was brought up that way.

But not the Nazis?
No, I don't agree with that at all.

What's the best thing about living in Britain today?
I hate Britain, and I want to move to Spain in the next couple of years, 'cos our country's not England anymore. It's very rare for English people to live here anymore. When I went to Lanzarote, I felt more English there than I do here, and that's no exaggeration.

But won't you then be an immigrant too?
Yeah but the answer to that is I would go over to their country and respect their country. I wouldn't go over there and try and do suicidal bombs [sic]. The immigrants that come over to this country should be making this a good country and proud of it and helping this country, but most of them don't.

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What do you think symbolises Britain best?
Well, I used to know Britain as strong, and over the past couple of years, I don't know if I've grown up, but I've seen it going soft. The memory I have is the war, and how we fighted [sic] all the people in WWI and WWII, and it makes me proud to be British.

Fish or chips?
Fish.

Alan Carr or Jimmy Carr?
Alan.

David Mellor or David Beckham?
Beckham.

Jesus Jones or Jesus Christ?
Jesus Christ.

Hieronymus Bosch or a Bosch electric sander?
I don't know them, I'll just put the second one.

Plato or Playdough?
Playdough.

Towel or rag?
Towel.

Morrissey or Eric Clapton?
Morrissey.

Nick Nolte or Nick Griffin?
Nick Griffin.

In terms of the BNP's repatriation policy on immigration, if you had to choose, who would you repatriate first, Dizzee Rascal or Tinchy Stryder?
The second one, because I've never heard of him and I like Dizzee Rascal.

Which do you dislike more: Muslims or Jews?
Muslims.

Do you think Nick Griffin is actually gay, or is that just a vicious rumour?
No. I think it's a vicious rumour.

Have you seen him in the flesh? He's quite mincey.
I've only seen him on the news. I really like him.

Do you think the anti-BNP movements are too overtly black?
Not really.

As a hypothetical solution to the immigration problem, what about dividing Britain down the middle, and using the left half for immigrants, and the right half for everyone else.
Sorry, I don't get that. Am I'm being really thick? No. I don't think so.

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What if immigrants could prove their usefulness – shouldn't they then be allowed to stay? For instance, if they began life here with a six-month period of forced labour? Perhaps spent making shoes for the rest of the population in a giant shoe factory in the East Midlands?
No. They shouldn't come to Britain at all in the first place.

What about people who've grown up in Britain from a very young age, but aren't, as the BNP would term it, "ethnically British"? When you repatriated them, don't you think the BNP should first give them intensive lessons in speaking, for example, the Ghanaian language, and learning the skills of an agriculturally-based society?
No. I don't think so. Just send them back. I know that sounds really evil…

OK, what if Ghana, or wherever, decrees that these immigrants are now Britain's responsibilty – that they no longer have the right to live in Ghana. Do you think war with Ghana would be justified to force the issue, or would you simply propose a system of gradually-raised trade sanctions, possibly with the aid of a UN mandate?
I wouldn't do the war, 'cos I'm against war. Er, the other one…

Carol Thatcher – hero or villain?
Hero.

Al Jolson – hero or villain?
I don't know who he is. Um, hero.

Mother Theresa – hero or villain.
Hero.

Hitler – hero or villian?
Villain.

Ant & Dec – heroes or villains?
Heroes.

Finally, has anything amusing ever happened to you in connection with spoons?
Spoons? No. I don't follow.

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Helen Riddell
Newcastle

Vice: How old are you?
Helen: 19. Wait, no, 18. 19 next month.

What do you do for a living?
I'm a kitchen assistant at the minute.

What first attracted you to the BNP?
I don't know. I couldn't really actually tell you. There were a couple of the sentences I agreed with. Basically about how immigrants are coming and taking people's jobs and that.

Are most of your friends BNP?
Some of them are.

And your parents?
No. What are they? I think Liberal Democrat. I dunno.

Are there any BNP policies you disagree with?
Not so far, no, 'cos I'm still in the middle of looking up all that about it at the moment.

When people say the BNP is a fascist party, what do you think?
Yes, in some ways it is. But there we are. It's a hard decision. There's some things I think are good and some things I think are bad, so it's a hard decision to make, but it was the one party I felt closer to than any of the other parties.

Is there a big anti-BNP movement up in Newcastle? Do you get a lot of stick?
Not really.

Do you have arguments about it with people?
Sometimes, yeah. But not like heated arguments.

Fish or chips?
Fish.

Alan Carr or Jimmy Carr?
Alan.

Princess Di or Jade Goody?
Di.

Blair or Brown?
Brown.

Michael Jackson or Tim Westwood?
Michael Jackson.

Peter Andre or Steven Hawking?
Peter Andre.

What do you think the BNP could do to improve its appeal to gay voters?
Erm, ooh, I don't know. I haven't a clue.

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In terms of the BNP's repatriation policy on immigration, if you had to choose, who would you repatriate first – Dizzee Rascal or Tinchy Stryder?
Tinchy Stryder, 'cos he's not very well known. Dizzee Rascal's more of a worldwide-known icon.

What should we do with Lenny Henry?
I don't even know who that is, sorry.

Which do you dislike more, Muslims or black people?
Muslims. I've never seen any advertisements about blacks who come here and don't work. It's more the Muslims, 'cos basically that's what I object to. My mum split up with my dad a couple of years ago, and she was going to get a flat off the council, and the first question they asked her on the form was "Are you an immigrant?" I don't agree with that, you see, so that's where it started from.

So you agree with the BNP's send-em-back policies?
Yeah.

But would it be possible to maybe come to a compromise with a noble race like the Chinese? Perhaps keep them on as a sort of servant class?
Yeah. I wouldn't mind them if they actually worked and didn't take all of our jobs, basically. I wouldn't mind them if they contributed something to this country.

What nationality would you most like to keep on in the UK?
African, because my nana's African. She was a white African from somewhere next to Cape Town. She moved back here in 1987 or something. My granddad was in the RAF over there and she came back with him.

So what nationality would you most like to be waited-on by as a servant class?
Oh God, there's a few. There's a couple I would, but I can't really pinpoint one.

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Go on.
I don't know. Chinese maybe?

Sure thing. What ethnicity would you most like to make love to?
Oh, God, British.

Outside of that?
Say… black.

What if immigrants only asked to be allowed into the country on condition they had been sterilised, so that they couldn't create any children to further burden the state? Would that be a potential solution?
Um, yeah, I think so.

Let's try a word association game. Just say the first word that comes into your head.
OK.

Golly.
Wally.

Rag.
Rug.

Goose.
Duck.

Oswald.
Place.

Concentration.
Head.

Bunny.
Rabbit.

Finally, has anything amusing ever happened to you in connection with spoons?
Spoons? Erm, no.

GAVIN HAYNES

By the way, we got back in touch with Rebecca Edwards a couple of weeks later, she wasn't too happy. Check it here.

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