Introducing the Profiles Issue

When dealing with idioms, you have to tread very carefully in regards to which ones you subscribe to, because you run the risk of inevitably being called out on your bullshit fortune-cookie rhetoric. For example, if you think you shouldn't judge a book by its cover but you also think a picture is worth a thousand words, you're basically saying you've got a thousand-word assessment in your head, but you still have no idea what's going on.

Luckily for you, the cover of our profile-themed May issue (shot by Nick Veasey) is so on-the-nose, that even if you have trouble molding your life to predictable parables and proverbs, you'll get an idea of what's in store. (Hint: It's a picture of some anarcho punk decked to the nines in leather, studs, lapel flair, and cliche hair. It's fitting because, deep down inside, he's just another poor sap made out of the same meaty goo that makes up his mainsteam contemporaries.)

In the spirit of capturing one's essence, here's a glimpse of some of the other stuff in this issue:

VICE Senior Associate Editor Krishna Andavolu flew to Uruguay, ground-zero to the world's first legal and regulated cannabis market, and profiled Jose Mujica, the country's current president and one of the main proponents of decriminalization.

In "The Mayor Vs. the Ooze," Sean Williams profiles another unsung hero, Toldi Tamas—the mayor of a small Hungarian town who saved his people from an environmental catastrophe.

Then, there's Jon Taffer. While he might not be a hero or a champion of political reform per se, he's reality TV's necessary evil. "Dive Bard" tells the story of America's greatest poet of drunkeness and failure.

VICE's weekend editor, Mitchell Sunderland, temporarily embedded himself in the gay porn realm for Body of an American, the story of Michael Lucas, a Russian immigrant who conquered porn and became one of the most powerful gay men in New York City.

We know the print magazine lasts about 30 whole seconds at boutiques and stores before it sells out, so why aren't you subscribed already? Do that right now right here. Got an iPad, fancy pants? Even better—download our FREE app, because then you get a whole bunch of extra stuff like extended interviews, more pictures, and all that jazz.