Tiff Tribulations

Blurry picture of James Franco, Gus Van Sant, and myself.

It’s TIFF time again. Those ten tempestuous days in September when the world suddenly pulls Toronto into focus and descends on it for its international film festival, picks it clean, and then leaves it as abruptly as it came to wallow in its relative international obscurity. The press and industry pass I am generously given to attend the festival does allow me to avoid hoi polloi, long line-ups, and the 25 dollar per movie ticket price, but it also forces me to rub aggressive elbows with that particular subgenus known as the show biz insider, who must be counted amongst the most obnoxious creatures on the planet. (Q: What do you call a hundred entertainment/infotainment “reporters” lying at the bottom of the sea? A: A good start!)

Celebrity is one of the biggest boondoggles of modern culture, lavishing as it does an inordinate amount of attention and money on a pampered and privileged few, often through a system of nepotism and graft, at the expense of an appreciation of our own authentic, genuine, individual lives. TIFF is particularly known for being so far up the ass of celebrities that it’s almost akin to appearing in Roger Ebert’s colonoscopy video as directed by Vincent Gallo. But hey, some of my best friends are celebrities, and as old P.T. Barnum said, there’s a sucker born every minute. I guess we get what we pay for.

Next week, when the festival is over, I’ll offer up some mini-reviews of the movies I’ve seen, but for now here’s a selection of photos I took on my iPhone during the first weekend of the festival, and also at my Mondo LaBruce party at the Bovine Sex Club. Apparently Edward Norton was there making out ferociously with some chick in the mosh pit, but I didn’t see him.

Dentata performing at my Mondo LaBruce TIFF party at the Bovine Sex Club.

Hot photographer and VICE contributor Scott Pilgrim. (Yes, that's his real name, and yes, the movie is probably based on him.)

Me and Scott Pilgrim

Mondo LaBruce DJ Kevin Hegge (left) and a hot boy.

The crazy mofos at the Mondo LaBruce TIFF party.

Tamsen, Dentata's bass player.

Dana and Tamsen of Dentata.

New Dentata drummer in front of Mistress Frostitution's self-portrait experimental film made expressly for the Mondo LaBruce party.

Hot trannies Nina Arsenault (left) and Lexi Tronic.

Regina the Gentlelady (aka Gentleman Reg).

Hairhopper

The delicious Karen Frostitution.

Mistress Frostitution rapes a boy on the dance floor while I DJ.

The luminous Bryce Dallas Howard, producer of Gus Van Sant's new movie, Restless, with its screenwriter, Jason Lew.

Me and James Franco at the party thrown for him by Eva Michon of Bad Day magazine, where I DJ'd with Kevin Hegge.