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The Ding Dong’s Guide To Chaos Theory

Chaos Theory gets pretty complex once you start adding numbers and physics and probability and all that smart stuff into the picture.
Κείμενο Kara-Lis Coverdale

Chaos Theory gets pretty complex once you start adding numbers and physics and probability and all that smart stuff into the picture. But when British physicist James Clerk Maxwell came up with the whole thing way back in 1873 he started with a simple observation: “When an infinitely small variation in the present state brings about a finite difference in the state of a system, the condition of the system is said to be unstable and renders impossible the prediction of future events.” In other words, every teeny thing you do, even something as simple as slapping on some cologne, talking to that girl you always had a crush on or picking your nose, has the potential to alter the future of all mankind, for better or worse. Not only does everything we do mess with us, but because there is so many miniscule factors randomly messing with things, it is impossible to predict how any future event will unfold. And this is a good thing; some people talk about their “path” in life or love or whatever, as if it’s some pre-determined route they don’t have the power to change. Thanks to Chaos Theory, we know that excuse is a load of crap. Our lives are nothing if not unpredictable products of change.


Mind blown yet? Later expanding on Chaos Theory, grew to include the “The Butterfly Effect” which illustrates exactly how a small change can result in massive differences in outcome. Apparently a hurricane’s formation could be dependent on the single flap of a butterfly’s wing several weeks before, which pretty much puts everything into perspective. People’s brains basically melted over this idea because suddenly everything seemed disorderly, confusing, and out of our control (like it wasn’t already). But it didn’t take long before scientists began to use their understanding of complex chaos systems with crazy equations to control chaos or at least try to use it to their advantage. Stock market analysts started to ride the market rather than get screwed by it, weather forecasting became less of a joke, and smarty pants manufacturers started designing products based on principles of chaos. Like washing machines that feature random pulsing mechanisms that make sure those greasy bacon bits you spilt all over your shirt last night don’t play third wheel on your next big date. Chaos might sound at first like a symptom of the apocalypse, but it can totally be fun. Basically chaos shouldn’t be feared but embraced, and once you do you’ll start realizing the little things you can do to increase your chances with the ladies. In the end, though, it’s a giant gamble you can never lose!

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