Sam McPheeters
Notes on the New Harry Dean Stanton Documentary
On Friday, I drove into Los Angeles to catch a showing of Partly Fiction, a new documentary about Harry Dean Stanton, and was reminded just how much audiences in LA love losing their shit over celebrities and celebrity culture.
Filming the Unfilmable
The Turner Diaries is a white-supremacist screed written by neo-Nazi activist William Pierce back in the 1970s. It partially inspired a half-dozen real-life crime sprees, including the Oklahoma City bombing. Could it ever be adapted into...
Coppola Gets Dickslapped
In the early 80s, following the prolonged public drama of Apocalypse Now, Francis Ford Coppola decided to make a nice little romantic comedy. He sunk over $25 million into the project, declared bankruptcy after its release, and spent the next...
Where Are All the Films About Economic Apocalypse?
So far, the films of the Great Recession have brought us the majestic biceps of Thor, the weaponized pecs of James Bond 6.0, and the beef Prometheus of Captain America. But let me direct your attention to Neal Israel's Americathon</i...
The Worst People
“I kind of wish everyone on Earth hadn't died,” Casey Anthony said, running her fingers through Rick Santorum's hair. “Just so we could all rub it in their stupid faces that we did survive.” Howls of laughter filled the beach. Courtney Love said, “God...
Balloons!
"Welcome to the 86th annual Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. I'm Bob, this is my co-anchor Ralph, and for the next hour, we'll be talking you through the giant balloons as they make their way down Sixth Avenue, towards the flagship Macy's Herald Square."
Reality Quiz
Greetings! In light of this week's election, your local GOP committee is sending out this quiz to gauge our party's commitment to reality. As a registered Republican, your input is crucial to determining future party direction. Remember, there are no...
Yelping Halloween
I took my kids trick or treating yesterday and the second stop on our route was the Hadley household. Right off the bat, they lose a star for giving out Life Savers. Is this a 6th grade secret santa grab bag? Run out of carob chips? The candy you serve...
Public Statement by Jerry Sandusky on His Release from Prison, February 2454
"First off, I'd like to offer my heartfelt appreciation for the miracle of cell-extension nanotechnology. Who knew it'd be so easy to add an extra thousand years to everyone's life? And I should acknowledge the US Supreme Court, for making sure...
Mock Blockers
It has been announced that Obama is preparing for the upcoming debates with the help of John Kerry, while Ohio Senator Rob Portman is working on whipping Romney into shape. Let's have a look at how the candidates are doing in their practice rounds.
Strike Gripes
We went to the front lines of the Chicago teachers strike and got the inside scoop on what's really going on. Turns out a lot of people are hungry for pizza and upset they're missing 'The Young and the Restless.'
iPhone 5 Drinking Games
Provide beers or light cocktails. Watch Apple event on TV. Take one sip every time you hear the words "game-changing," "revolutionary," "visionary," or "power efficient."