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How Not to Become Our Intern

Can you all just calm down and talk to us like normal people for a second please?

Here's an iPhone photo of the only intern we have in Toronto. He presumed we were going to use it for a BBW dating site and was cool with that.

Something magical happens every three to six months (roughly) in our offices. We put out a polite and dignified call for interns, thinking, perhaps naively, that descriptors like "hardworking", "intelligent" and "not totally shitty" will be enough to get the point across and, like clockwork, the tidal wave of tell-all, snarkfest applications comes down on us like shitty, diary-style hellfire.

Annons

The best (worst) have been screen-capped here and already used internally for our own giggs.

Possibly someone's Dad.

There are things which give our eyes pleasure but this and what followed were not them.

Aggressive, at least.

Our oven is hot, can we shove you into it?

We've already had a freaky Kenny G, sorry guy!

We got plenty of that flavour mane.

Pretty good joke, actually.

This guy can hang, hundo percent.

Anyway, can you all just calm down and talk to us like normal people for a second please?