2013 has been a banner year for awful metalcore rap videos. First, Falling in Reverse dropped the mother of all videos for their already legendary-for-all-the-wrong-reasons song, “Alone,” which combined everyone’s least favorite musical genres: godawful metalcore and white boy rap. With over 4 million YouTube views from people who enjoy watching Internet trainwrecks, it quickly became the 2 Girls, 1 Cup of 2013. Then last week, Atlanta deathcore/rap band, Attila, upped the game with their new video for “About That Life.”
The video has everything:
-Singer who looks like Pete Wentz’s kid brother: Check
-Shirt with Legion of Doom-style shoulder pads: Check
-Big bootied rap ladies twerking: (Had to check with a cool person on this, but yes) Check
-White boy swag: Oh lord, check
-A seven-foot-long bong, blunts, and all kinds of crazy rap video smoke: *coughcough* Check
-A ripping ‘80s guitar solo on a Flying V guitar accompanied by two sexy metal checks: Double check (1 check for each lady)
-A girl with the Skrillex haircut: Obviously, check_Making it rain: Check
-The lyric, “I had diamonds but I threw them away cause I don't give a fuck / SUCK MY FUCK / she rides my dick like its a merry go round / and I just bust my nut on her”: That’s a big check right there.
-The headscratching confusion over whether or not this video was made as a parody or in earnest: …Check?
Congratulations, Attila, you’ve truly raised the bar for how many terrible subgenres of music can be combined and it still be considered music. Would any bands out there care to top this? Perhaps crabcore/polka? Or deathgrind/Kidz Bop-core? Make it happen.