_Children and parents pose for a photo next to one of many oversize statues of Jesus Christ at Tierra Santa._

_Every hour the Son of God rises out of this mountain like a holy Pop-Tart._

_Tierra Santa&#x2019;s reenactment of Genesis is an extravaganza of lights and music. It looks like a nightclub on a Christian-themed cruise._

_A visitor looks on in sorrow as a fiberglass Roman scourge mercilessly tortures Jesus. Behind them stands a questionable replica of the Wailing Wall._

_A Roman soldier stands guard at Tierra Santa._

_La República&#x2019;s executive building is a colorful castle that looks very similar to a certain fortified abode of Sleeping Beauty at Disneyland. Maybe people would pay more attention to world affairs if politicians actually worked in places like this._

_A girl fills out a make-believe loan application during a bank workshop at La República de los Niños. It&#x2019;s good for kids to realize at an early age that they will forever be in debt._

_A child who elected himself speaker of the house steps up to the podium at La República&#x2019;s congress building. The park&#x2019;s architects&#x2014;Gallo, Lima, and Cuenca&#x2014;modeled the exterior on London&#x2019;s Palace of Westminster. Of course, everything inside is scaled down to sizes appropriate for pint-size civil servants._

_Luján Zoo administrator Santiago Semino said that young children are generally not allowed in the cages of large animals as a safety precaution, but no one stopped this family from posing with this cute li&#x2019;l carnivore._

_This boy gave the tiger a loving kiss after a zoo employee urged him to do so. He later ran back for seconds._

_The puma that (probably) attacked the author. It&#x2019;s impossible to be sure because they all looked the same._

Argentina is home to two amusement parks and one zoo where having fun means completely ignoring the voice in your head that says, &ldquo;This is not normal.&rdquo; I know this because I recently visited all three and returned home physically and mentally battered.

FYI.

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