All Bad News Considered
An Atlanta Man Claimed He Was Too Good-Looking to Be Guilty of Raping a Woman
A man claimed he was too good-looking to have raped a woman, a toe-sucking fetishist sucked a woman's toes in a big-box store, and some idiots thought Seattle cops reopened the Kurt Cobain suicide investigation.
Sbarro Filed for Bankruptcy Protection, and Scientists Think We Can Clone Woolly Mammoths
Sbarro filed for bankruptcy protection, scientists think we can clone woolly mammoths, engineers and a pretentious British musician created a robotic rock band, and more bad news from across the world.
A Polio-Like Illness Has Affected Children in California
Children in California exhibited polio-like symptoms, Australia banned a forgotten art film, the British government used webcams to spy on millions of people, and the General Authority of Islamic Affairs and Endowments issued a fatwa against...
Sudan Charged a Rape Victim with Adultery and Prostitution
This week, Sudan charged a gang-rape victim with adultery and prostitution charges, a woman claimed to have murdered 22 men, and Zimbabwe authorities arrested a former Democratic representative for owning porn.
A Rogue Wave Killed a Man Through His Cruise Cabin Window
This week, Canada used the Philippines as its personal garbage can, a venture capitalist said the one percent has it just as bad as the jews during Nazi Germany, and a publishing house consented to the wishes of right-wing religious nuts.
A Five-Foot Jellyfish Landed on a Beach in Tasmania
This week, a five-foot jellyfish landed on a beach, Jay Leno retired, and congress cut roughly $8 billion worth of food-stamp funding.
Philip Seymour Hoffman Found Dead in His Apartment in New York
This morning, Philip Seymour Hoffman was found dead at the age of 46 in his Manhattan apartment. It's hard to think of an actor who has been in more vital movies, each with pitch-perfect performances, in the last two decades.
Authorities Arrested Revenge Porn King Hunter Moore and Justin Bieber on the Same Day
This week, cops arrested Justin Bieber, the feds finally busted revenge porn king Hunter Moore for hacking, a racist Republican announced his vision for Detroit, and Consumer Reports announced that caramel-colored sodas' artificial colors are probably...
The Cocktails 'MLK Jr. Would Be Proud Of' and a Man Who Drove Around Wearing Nothing but Swiss Cheese
This week, a PR team thought it would be a good idea to namedrop MLK in a marketing campaign, someone was shot dead during a Marky Mark flick, and a Philadelphia man drove around wearing nothing but cheese.
The Insane Clown Posse Sued the FBI and Justice Department
This week, the Insane Clown Posse sued the FBI, new research showed great white sharks live as long as humans, and Colleen LaRose was convicted of conspiracy to murder Swedish artist Lars Vilks.
Libertarians Created RonPaulCoin, and Oregon Let Mothers Take Their Placentas Home
This week, price gauging became common place in Colorado's weed market, Oregon allowed mothers to leave hospitals with their placentas, and some nutty libertarians created RonPaulCoin. In other words, 2014 is already a weird year for America.
All This Year's Bad News Considered
We're getting closer to the end of the year, which means it's time to momentarily turn our heads backwards and look back at the five biggest news stories from the past 365 days. In no specific order here are the definitive bad news stories of 2013.