What Will You Do When David Bowie Dies?
Welcome to Question of the Day. It gives interns something to do!
When David Bowie dies the streets will fill with people. Every digital radio, Spotify playlist, and all of YouTube will ring out endlessly with the Christ of British pop's reedy-throated sermons. BBC Radio 6 will campaign for an airport to be named after him, before giving in and renaming their own station Bowie FM. The entirety of the world's music writers will drop to their knees and scream skywards in desperate unison: “TAKE US INSTEAD!” There will be a beautiful tribute episode of The X Factor.
But what will you, the gentiles of Bowie-anity, do when David Bowie dies?
Mike, 37, bike courier: I’m gonna shit myself.
Because that would just be devastating and I would lose control of myself, basically.
Has David Bowie played a big part in your life?
Yeah, like that time he turned up to my dad’s birthday party and rocked out.
Your dad must have been a very interesting man.
Yeah, he was alright until he got carted off in David Bowie’s spaceship and never appeared again.
Stevie, 22, student: I’ll be sad. I’ll have to listen to "Livin’ On A Prayer" over and over on repeat to cement his memory.
"Livin’ On A Prayer" is a Bon Jovi song.
Yes. Why do you like David Bowie?
It’s rare for me to know who a singer is. At least with David Bowie, I know who he is.
Who will replace David Bowie?
Is anyone as cool as David Bowie? There’s no one standing behind him ready to take his place yet, I don’t think.
Will it be you?
Chris, 28, web developer: Who? Whoa! Oh my goodness!? Can I just not answer this question?
VICE: Yeah. Are you a Bowie fan?
Paul, 51, security guard: I’ll be sad when David Bowie dies because I’m a Bowie fan.
VICE: Do you have any Bowie-related memories?
Yeah, I went to see him when I was 14. I was all tarted up in my finery, dressed as the Thin White Duke in a black suit and waistcoat, smoking Gitanes or Gauloises or something of that ilk.
And yet you ended up a security guard.
Yes, alas... But I was well into Bowie. I had all his albums up until Tin Machine—I had to pull the plug on Tin Machine. That was terrible.
Do you have a favorite Bowie song?
"Watch That Man" off Aladdin Sane, that’s a great track. It’s a really good lyric and a really good vibe.
Phoebe, 21, student: That’s an odd question. I’ll probably be quite sad. Why are you asking this?
VICE: Because we are.
I’ll probably put on his albums and listen to them for a full day, at least. That’s what I did with Michael Jackson.
Will you cry in the dark?
No. Maybe shed a tear, but not too much. He’s just an artist, but a good one.
What’s your favorite Bowie song?
They’re all good. I can’t remember them right now. Have you seen Velvet Goldmine?
No. Who’s the next Bowie?
I bloody hope it’s not Lady Gaga.
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