Hey Ron - Nothing Worse Than a Little Power

I’m not in power in the corporate world. In the streets, yes, there was a time when I had power. We’re not talking about that anymore. In the workplace, it’s more like the power of the pen. Outside of the walls that you work—doesn’t have to be here, this could be anywhere you’re the boss— you’re hospitable to people, you show people respect, like when you’re on the train. Why? Because nobody knows who you are; you have no title or authority and they don’t have to deal with your crap. There was a time when people showed respect because it was a common courtesy. Now people are like, “I got this power and I’m in control and you got no say.”

Sometimes power isn’t healthy. People get empowered and they start treating others differently. We could be good friends and all of a sudden they get a little power and they go on this trip, and they go ballistic on their friends, not knowing that these are the same people they’re going to see on their way down.

My thinking is, I won’t wait until you’re on your way down. I’ll be waiting for you outside the door because I’m going to get you to speak to me with respect and I’ll give you respect back. But don’t talk to me as if I don’t matter and then apologize later when it’s just the two of us. If you can yell at me in public, you can apologize to me in public.

As a man, I’m glad when people come up to me and go, “You know what? I apologize. It really wasn’t you I was yelling at. I was having a bad day.” But if you go about your day as if that level of disrespect is the norm, I’m either going to address it or have nothing to say to you. Just don’t speak to me until you’re feeling better because I can black out and I don’t want to black out.

“Black out” means I’ll be doing 15 to life. I’m dead serious when I say I black out. I just lose all rationality, nothing matters. I have to walk away from situations ‘cause I’ll say something I’ll regret or do something I’ll regret. I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older that acting like that isn’t worth it.

Just now, when I went to go see a co-worker friend of mine that was going through something, he kind of lashed out at me so I just looked at him, turned around, and I walked away. My look spoke for itself. I didn’t have to say anything else. He knew that I was annoyed. We left it as it was. Later, he came to me and apologized for being a butthole.