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How Did We Not Know About This Early 90s Danish Dance Remix of the Twin Peaks Theme?

"Audrey's in the house!"
Emma Garland
London, GB

The title sequence of Twin Peaks is one of the best moments in television history. I don't give a shit how many episodes there are, or that it's almost three minutes of extreme slow-panning across scenes of wood-cutting, desolate roads, and waterfalls: you will watch every second of it, every single time, and you will love it.

Imagine, though, that instead of being an exploration of good and evil set in the existentialism of a remote North American town, Twin Peaks was actually an exploration of highs and comedowns set in the existentialism of the early 90s club scene. And instead of being a minimal synth lullaby with shoegazey vocals, the main theme was actually a Bran Van 3000-style remix with a rap breakdown featuring such bars as "Laura Palmer on the disco biscuit" and "Audrey's in the house!" Sounds great, right? Well luckily for all of us that is precisely what what Danish group One Eyed Jacks - comprised of Kjeld Tolstrup, Keith Gordon and Turid Nørlund Christensen - were imagining when they released this cover of the Twin Peaks theme in 1991 that went largely unappreciated.

As well as being a genuinely valid interpretation, the video sees a Laura-lookalike on vocals surrounded by people dressed as ghosts breakdancing around an empty car park. Imagine if David Lynch and Mark Frost directed a spin-off series of Buffy in which Tara ditches witchcraft to pursue a career in pop music instead of dying and breaking my heart? That's what this is like.

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