Gigantic Asshole Ajit Pai Is Officially Gone. Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)

Pai killed net four years of handouts to Big Telecom are over.
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Image: Gage Skidmore via Flickr

Ajit Pai, the man who killed net neutrality, enacted a series of industry-friendly deregulatory moves for big telecom, and drank from a gigantic mug, is no longer around to terrorize the internet. The FCC confirmed to Motherboard that Pai is officially gone:

"Federal Communications Commission Chairman Ajit Pai today concluded his four years as Chairman, eight years as a Commissioner, and twelve years as an employee of the agency,” the agency said.


His official FCC Twitter account, where he antagonized people who criticized him, has been deleted. 

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Pai stood out among the sea of Trump’s corrupt political employees because he was effective and he survived the entire administration. The former Verizon lawyer fought against net neutrality and won, then danced the Harlem Shake on its grave in one of the biggest cringe videos ever posted online.

“By the time I turn in my badge, I will have spent a total 4,557 days working here,” Pai said in a goodbye video posted to his personal Twitter account. That’s almost 4,500 days of a giant coffee cup, embarrassing posts, and bad policy.

The consequences of his leadership will be with us for decades. He rolled back decades of regulation and transferred power to broadband companies on an unprecedented scale.

Here is a list of harmful nonsense Pai and his FCC did over the last four years:

  • Killed net neutrality
  • Approved T-Mobile / Sprint merger
  • Repeatedly released reports that claimed U.S. broadband is fine
  • Defended murder of net neutrality in court
  • Flubbed Puerto Rico hurricane disaster response
  • Slow-walked and obstructed investigation into telecom company sale of your location data
  • Said FTC would protect net neutrality (it didn’t, and couldn’t)
  • Falsely claimed killing net neutrality was good for broadband access (it wasn’t)
  • Refused to brief Congress about telecom companies’ sale of their customers’ phone location data
  • Helped Comcast and other major telecom companies in their pursuit of monopolistic power
  • Oversaw America’s falling rank in an annual “Internet Freedom” index
  • Allowed Verizon to throttle California firefighters’ data while they were fighting unprecedented wildfires
  • Invented a DDoS attack that shut down the FCC’s net neutrality comment system
  • Lied to public about that fake DDoS attack that shut down the agency’s net neutrality comment system
  • Lied to Congress about that fake DDoS attack
  • Didn’t detect that dead people were leaving comments on net neutrality comment system
  • Refused to change the definition of ‘broadband’ 
  • Demanded $200 to release emails about his giant mug
  • Allowed scammers to submit fake comments about net neutrality under the names of two sitting senators
  • Did that dumbass Harlem Shake thing with a pizzagate conspiracy theorist
  • Became a rubber stamp for Sinclair Media and 
  • Tried to kill a broadband assistance program that subsidized internet connections for the economically unstable and poor
  • Got a literal gun from the NRA for his “courage” in killing net neutrality
  • Was investigated by his own agency for alleged corruption as he pushed to dismantle media consolidation rules
  • Published report claiming broadband market was magically fixed by repealing net neutrality
  • Ignored 22 million comments supporting net neutrality
  • Tried to reclassify cell phone data service as “broadband internet”
  • Allowed phone call rates for incarcerated people to skyrocket

Here are 150 articles Motherboard wrote about Pai during his tenure.

We will not miss him.