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Kill the Engine

I Get It, It's a Cat

I've said it before and I'll say it again, super detailed monumental dinosaur sculpture wrinkles are going to be the next big thing with the kids.

This past week I went to the beach (South Padre Island) with my wife and child. On our way there we passed this super crazy tourist attraction/gift shop called Bobz World and I thought to myself, "If I don't shoot enough photos in South Padre to write a blog, then we're probably going to have to stop here on the way back home."

We stopped here on the way back home.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, super detailed monumental dinosaur sculpture wrinkles are going to be the next big thing with the kids. Either that or more intentionally crappy tattoos and silly tank tops. I get it, it's a cat.


Sorry, where was I? Oh yeah, there was a dude with a tribal mask and a dress surfing a volcano.

And these guys. What's that, a bear and a peach-colored alien with a boner? Sure, why not?

And here we go.

Without a doubt the largest collection of seashell-infused crap I have ever seen firsthand.

If you made an art installation this crazy you'd be considered a genius. Or an idiot. The art world is so fickle.

This bro had zombie hands.

And this dude was just kind of hanging out being handsome.

Everywhere I turned there was something beautiful.

I think this might be an unintentional Spicoli.

Uh… lots of koozies… where am I going with this?

Coconut monkeys with bikinis? Is that funny?

More silly hats than I've ever seen together in one place. Wait, what's that thing in the middle on the far left?

Oh, just an animal's face. Not a big deal.

Is $9.99 a good price for an animal's face these days? I've lost track of the going rate.

Anyway… despite my sarcasm I think Bobz World is awesome. Apparently they also have a "museum" in the back, but I was unable to check it out because there was a group of school kids who had reserved it for a few hours. Jerks. If you ever find yourself driving to South Padre Island check it out for yourself. Buy yourself a nice animal's face while you're there. See you next time, Bobz.

When we got home I downloaded my Bobz photos and realized I probably didn't have enough images to write about to fulfill my column's required word count. So when in doubt, go skate a ditch. I called up all of my usual skate buddies (all three) but they were all busy doing grown-up stuff so I decided to just go on a solo-mission. I was crossing my fingers that somebody would be at the ditch when I got there. Not because I'm afraid to skate by myself, but just because I felt like it would be a damn shame for all of my terrific maneuvers not to be witnessed by at least one lucky individual.


There was no need to worry. The Sunday ditch siren was heard loud and clear by many an old and young man alike. I love that skating ditches in Texas often involves driving out to the country vs. traditional street skating which involves driving into the heart of a city or industrial areas of a town. There's something awesome about skating in the middle of a field surrounded by trees and flowers. Or maybe I'm just a hippie. That would help explain all of the acid I just ate.

Plywood roll-in > any set of stairs.

This is Ed. He's my new friend. He threw down some weird moves. And by "weird" I mean "awesome."

Some heavy cruising went down too.

And some no-handed air time.

By the time I left there was a pretty heavy session in the works. Kinda hard to tell what year it is from this photo.

This is my buddy Erik Conn's board. L.S.D.C. stands for Little Surf Ditch Crew. The guys who frequent this spot take really good care of the ditch and deserve a pat on the back for sweeping, shoveling, weeding, picking up trash, and essentially making sure that the spot doesn't become a bust. Thanks, guys. But, like I've mentioned before, I'm not a fan of secret spots, and I think ditches especially should be public domain. So here's instructions on how to get to this ditch:

Go to South Austin, take a left, look for the ditch on the right, pass that ditch and then look for the ditch on the left. You can't miss it. You're welcome.


See you next time Little Surf Ditch. Thanks for having me over.

No movie review this week. But I'll for real try to go rent Soul Man to review next Monday. But for really real this time.

Previously - Anarchy and Jesus Fish?

Roger Skateboards