Modern Lovers

Ex-Lovers Sue Each Other Over Expenses From Their Relationship

An Indonesian man is suing his ex-girlfriend for all the money he spent on her while they were dating. In response, his ex sued him back for all the times he used her restroom and drank her water.
translated by Jade Poa
August 13, 2019, 12:02pm
court hearings
Image via Shutterstock (left); Image of court process via Reuters (right)

It’s common to see ex-lovers demanding their belongings back from each other after a break-up. But making a breakdown of every cent you’ve ever spent on them, then suing them for it? That’s exactly what one bitter ex-boyfriend in the Indonesian city of Maumure, East Nusa Tenggara did. Alfridus Arianto took his ex-girlfriend, Fransiska Nona Liin, to court because she refused to continue the relationship. This, despite the fact that… wait for it… Arianto already has two wives.


Arianto brought the case to the Maumere Court to demand Rp40 million (US$2,800) from his ex. He said he wants compensation for all the money he spent on her while they were dating.

The first court date was on July 30, when the judge offered the plaintiff and defendant to settle the case peacefully out of court, presumably because he didn’t feel like dealing with such a petty case. While Liin agreed to those terms, Arianto refused and demanded she pay back ten times what he spent on her during their relationship.

Arianto even upped his demands from Rp40 million (US$2,800) to Rp400 million (US$28,000) in the event that his ex decides to marry another man.

“In June 2016, I made a statement saying that if she marries another man, she must return my money tenfold. I stated that over the phone, and she acknowledged it,” Arianto told local media. Arianto says he came up with the Rp 40 million sum based on bank transfer records and receipts from spending money on Liin.

Presiding judge Arif Mahardika said Liin broke up with her 41-year-old boyfriend because he wanted a polygamous relationship. “Fransiska said she broke up with the plaintiff after learning he already has two wives,” Mahardika was quoted as saying.

According to the Maumere District Court’s website, Arianto’s lawsuit is filed under Indonesia’s “fulfilment of contractual obligation” article, which applies when two parties make a promise, and one party doesn’t fulfil their end of the agreement. In this case, it’s important to remember that in Indonesia, it’s fully possible for your estranged ex-lover to actually use casual promises, especially in written form, against you in court.


After multiple attempts to make peace with Arianto, Liin decided to fight back and play his game on August 2.

In court, she denied that any such agreement took place while she was dating Arianto, and therefore was not obligated to compensate him. She said Arianto’s argument is baseless because when they were together, she considered everything he gave her to be a boyfriend’s expression of love.

Liin also sued him back over the drinking water he consumed and the many times he used her restroom when he came to her house. “The plaintiff came to the defendant’s house, used her restroom [and] will be sued for compensation. The restroom is for Liin’s and her family’s use, not the defendant’s,” Liin’s lawyer said.

We wouldn’t be surprised if Arianto, in turn, sued her for all the petrol he used going to and from Liin’s house. And maybe Liin would then sue for electricity he consumed at her house.

Either way, we have a feeling this legal journey is going to be a long one, and we hope Mahardika is a patient judge.

This article originally appeared on VICE ID.