Who's the King of Clubs: London or Liverpool?

Clubbing should never be a competition, obviously, but it sort of is. Every DJ wants to be better than every other DJ, every club wants to be better than the dive down the road, and every city with clubs in it wants to be a better city for clubbing than the fucking DUMP a few miles down the motorway.

This Saturday sees one hell of a line up roll up the country for a big day in the North West. Liverpool's legendary Chibuku is playing host to an interstellar line up, taking over the super trendy Camp and Furnace venue. Expect sets from the likes of Bicep, Marcel Dettmann, Scuba, Leon Vynehall, PBR Streetgang, Barely Legal, Special Request, DJ EZ and a tonne more. And because it's not happening in London it probably only costs about a quid for a pint. Not like those expensive pints in London!

As someone who's spent a lot of time in both Liverpool — I'm from nearby Birkenhead — and London — which is where I work and live — my friends at THUMP thought I'd be the perfect person to weigh up the best things about each city and conduct a kind of clubbing Battle Royale. I'll leave you to decide who the winner was.

Variety: You're never more than a stone's throw away from a club or venue in London. Sadly most of these places are only good for throwing stones at, but it does at least give you a smug sense of superiority over the rest of the nation and their impoverished lack of clubbing variety. Heathens, the lot of them.

Flexibility: The call London the city that never sleeps… I've always thought of it more as the city that never wakes up, however if you're the kind of savage that wants to hit the club on a Monday night, someone, somewhere (Vauxhall) will no doubt be ready and willing to meet your needs.

Transport: 24-hour tube anyone? I for one can't wait for the Sodom and Gomorrah scenes of carnage as last night's clubbers converge with the next morning's commuters. An encounter with one of the previous night's jaw-swingers at 6.30am might just edge you over from "Bad case of the Mondays" to full-Falling Down

Boris Bikes: For the more adventurous clubber, Boris bikes represent a low-cost and environmentally friendly way to eliminate yourself from the gene pool.

Huge Line-ups: The city does attract some crazy line-ups. Better still would be not having to walk around asking strangers "Are these Francis Inferno Orchestra??" before eventually Googling pictures of him on your phone.

Smaller scale: Liverpool's pedestrian scale keeps the party's momentum up between venues. Unfortunately things do tend to get a bit Warriors when it comes to the long walk from club to taxi and the whole city has had ten drinks too many.

Relaxed door policy: It's a far cry from Berghain's notoriously selective door policy here in Liverpool. On the upside you've got a much more inclusive clubbing experience, on the downside you do tend to get a bit of riffraff in the dark room.

Smaller venues: Smaller venues equal good times, less wandering around in huge smoke filled rooms looking for your mates or the bogs. Can be a bit tricky when you spend ten minutes in the smoking area blagging football chat based solely on the phrase "Klopp in the Kopp" read from the back of someone else's paper, then bump into the same die-hard fan an hour later looking for your thoughts on next season's line-up.

Cheap drinks: The popularity of 'quad-vods' would maybe make sense in some sort of prohibition type scenario, but when the drinks in the club are only marginally pricier, it's just worrying. Still, what about the price of beer in London, eh!?!?!?!?!?!?

Nearby hospitals: This might seem a bit macabre, but don't underestimate the value of a nearby A&E when you break your leg surfing an ironing board down a flight of stairs or whatever.

For more information on the Chibuku extravaganza, head here.