Most Canadian Couple of All Time Gets Married at Tim Hortons in Hockey Jerseys

Not long ago, friends of mine got married. In total they had about a dozen wedding-related events split between two cities, which were heavy on things like limos, personal chefs, the Fairmont hotel, and drugs (so not all terrible). When not enough people showed up to the bridal shower, the bride ordered a social media blackout and threw another one. It was generally a good time, but also physically and financially draining, which is why I have to give serious props to Lethbridge, Alberta, couple Greg Arlett and Adonus Wiseman.

Artlett and Wiseman had planned on a destination wedding in Mexico. It fell through. In an almost unheard-of display of chill, they thought fuck it and this week got hitched in a Tim Hortons instead.

The couple didn't check to see if there were any community centers or Swiss Chalets available (they did unsuccessfully try for a hockey arena), instead embracing the very essence of Canadiana by saying their vows in a low-brow, takeout coffee shop best known for being fucking everywhere.

"They never go anywhere without a Tim Hortons cup," friend Juanita DeVos told reporters, to which Wiseman added, "I feel kind of naked without it."

While other newlyweds these days spend thousands of dollars staging scenes from Star Wars and Jurassic Park in attempt to go viral, Arlett and Wiseman took their wedding photos at the place they hang out every day—the parking lot in front of Tim Hortons. It couldn't have cost them much more than a 50-pack of Timbits.

The bride and groom also wore hockey jerseys supporting their favorite teams, Artlett repping the Edmonton Oilers and Wiseman the Montreal Canadiens. They exchanged brand new jerseys—Wiseman turned hers into a wedding gown—in front of an officiant dressed as a referee while "The Hockey Song" by Stompin' Tom Connors played in the background. I can't think of a more appropriate wedding song than one that is all about sliding the puck into the twine.

Guests, also wearing jerseys, took home pucks that said, "We played, we scored, always and forever Mr. & Mrs."

"I feel more at peace now," said Wiseman of the venue choice. "This is exactly where we're supposed to be."

Love like that doesn't come around often.

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