Rating and Slating This Year's Pride Brand Tie-Ins

This year, Pride in London feels like a big one. Mayor Sadiq Khan has been flying the Pride flag outside City Hall for the past fortnight, three Zone 1 tube stations have been redecorated with rainbow roundels, and, erm, some pretty offensive Pride posters were withdrawn after becoming trending news. Tomorrow, 40,000 people will be marching through central London in the annual Pride parade, while a million others hit the streets nearby to celebrate.

Perhaps inevitably, more brands than ever want a slice of the Pride in London pie – because it shows how woke they are, right? Some Pride tie-ins can seem pretty cynical, but this doesn't mean they offer no benefit to general LGBT visibility. A rainbow flag on display is a rainbow flag on display, whoever paid for it. Still, some of 2017's Pride day specials do need calling out, if only so the brands in question buck their ideas up next year. Here are five of our favourites doing the rounds right now.

On the one hand, this is a basic af example of the "just put a rainbow on it" trend. But on the other, it's also a basic af Pride day LOL. And that's because the Nando's logo is a cock. Will someone point out that you happen to be "waving a big queer cock about all over Soho Square"? Yes, of course they. And you will probably laugh.

These are kind of cute, but also kind of misguided. You don't need rainbow-coloured sprinkles to make a Frappucino (even) gayer - you just ask for it "skinny".

Who says you can't improve on the natural beauty of a rose with a little deftly-applied spray-paint? These would probably give someone at Kew Gardens a coronary, but I kind of like their shameless garishness. And if some low-key homophobe has to push past the Pride roses on his way to picking up a "real man's snack" like a pasty or a Yorkie bar, I'm totally here for them queering up Tesco Metro this weekend.

They've literally changed one letter in the name of their Dead Hippie burger, sprinkled some pink glitter on the bun, and called it a Pride season special. It's the burger chain equivalent of drawing two silver stars on your face and calling it a Sink the Pink look. Still, MEATliquor are donating a quid from every Dead Happie burger to Stonewall, so at least they're putting their money where their mouth is. A mouth that screams, "I love the gays, me!," before doing a sassy lip-sync to Work Bitch.

Let's be real: this just doesn't work, does it? Because when you see "Purple Rain", you think of dearly departed pop superstar Prince, not LGBT Pride. Admittedly, Prince is a queer icon who was busting open reductive gender rules back in the '80s, but this Pride tie-in still feels half-assed and tenuous. And it doesn't help that the hot dog in question looks like it's been jizzed on by a hungover Smurf.

@mrnicklevine