If the birth (and demise) of the Noisey comments section has taught us anything, it is that people all over the world are united in their love of having opinions on things. Hell, some of us have even made a career out of it. But when you lower the dam on hundreds and thousands of thoughts, musings and hot takes on everything from lunch meats to Ed Balls, you begin to lose sight of what is good and what is trash.
In order to deduce what is good music and what is trash music, we at Noisey have discovered that the solution is to call up really famous people and force them to listen to artists from David Guetta to Death Grips, and await the results. In other words, do our jobs for us.
In the past, we've made Idris Elba to listen to Skepta – which led to him doing a sick Skepta impression over the phone and, shortly after, releasing his own remix of "Shutdown"; we accidentally converted Will Young into a massive Oneohtrix Point Never fan; we asked Cradle of Filth frontman Dani Filth what the sound of the summer would be and we found out that Sir Tom Jones is well into Lady Leshurr.
Recently, we realised we hadn't yet canvassed the opinion of an Official Young Person, which felt like an oversight considering young people's opinions are the only opinions that matter. With that in mind, we phoned up 18-year-old pop prodigy Zara Larsson, because her new single "Ain't My Fault" is pop perfection, and her recent collabs with J Hus and Lil Yachty shows she has a flawless taste in music. We made her listen to a bunch of the biggest and not-so-biggest musical sensations of the the last few months, and here are her thoughts:
Hannah Diamond - "Fade Away"
Come on then Zara. First up, Hannah Diamond…
Zara: I thought this song was very dreamy. Even though it has this electro beat to it, her voice is so soothing and light. It's gorgeous. I can really see why people are into stuff like this. It gets me in some sort of a trance, even though it's a pop song.
Is PC Music big in Sweden?
I bet it is, but I kind of stick to my playlists on Spotify and whatever's on there. I follow a lot of hip-hop and stuff like that, but I get it. There's so many subcultures for a lot of groups that listen to all these types of music that I have no idea about. It's a whole different world. But I can really see this working in Sweden.
Robbie Williams - "Party Like A Russian"
Robbie Williams is back, Zara. Do you hear me? Robbie Is Back.
Zara: I watched the video to this and I thought it was very fun, but I think the song is a bit dated. To me it's like, yo… come on, you can do better than this. Robbie Williams is a huge star. He sold out Wembley, what, 11 times in a row, something crazy like that? So I think he could've done something better. I like the sample of "Dance of the Knights" – that makes sense – and when I watched the video I was immediately like, I want to watch it again! It's entertaining but I don't know if I'd be like, "Oh my gosh yaaas Robbie come through with this new song!"
Do you think big pop stars should be braver with what they put out?
I do think that people can be way braver. Success is the best thing that can happen to you, because it gives you confidence. Once you've had a couple of hits you should be able to try out something new. Take Beyonce, for example. She's still very mainstream, but if Lemonade was her first album people would be like "Oh cool." But now, it's like, "Holy shit!" Because people really listen once you have that big audience. Robbie's a huge artist, he can do better. This is mediocre to me.
Swet Shop Boys - "Zayn Malik"
So we're really into this one. A new rap project by Riz Ahmed and Heems (Das Racist) with beats from Redinho.
Zara: Now, this is super interesting. It's almost like they're rapping off beat? It's really stripped back with this noisy beat and I thought it was pretty cool. It sounds really different to anything that's come out this year. I need to check these guys out!
Moby & The Void Pacific Choir - "Are You Lost in the World Like Me?"
So, what we have here is a politically enraged Moby. A new Moby. A Moby who is, more so than usual, mad at humanity for destroying the environment and loving capitalism. This is Moby at boiling point. This is Moby vs dicks. Thoughts?
I felt like this was very throwback, very 80s, which I kind of like. It also feels kind of new wave. The main thing my dad listens to is 70s British punk and that's kind of the way he sings this song, but over a more electronic track. I don't normally listen to this type of music but I can recognise in it the stuff that my dad loves. I thought this was cool. I recognise Moby's name and I've probably heard a few songs of his but I've never sat down and listened to him on purpose. He doesn't normally do this kind of stuff right? I respect that.
Little T - "Move On"
Okay finally, this is Little T. He's a rapper from the North of England fresh out of primary school, who is creating quite the storm on YouTube for good and bad reasons.
I literally died! He's adorable. He has a good flow too. I can't wait for him to grow up because if he really wants to do rap or be an artist he's gonna be great. If he has people around him, parents and people who believe in him, I think he could really work. Especially if he writes his own music. Some of the things he says it's like, you're a little boy! What are you saying! But I thought he was cute, and good, not just cute. I was impressed. This one is my favourite.
Follow Emma on Twitter.