Down Goes Brown's Weekend Review: John Scott, New Format Made for All-Star Show

This article originally appeared on VICE Sports Canada.

(Editor's note: Sean McIndoe looks back at recent play in the NHL and the league's biggest storylines in his weekend review. You can follow him on Twitter.)

Well, that was… not terrible? It really wasn't terrible at all. Not even a little bit.

These days, that's what passes for a ringing endorsement of All-Star Weekend. After years of watching the event get progressively worse, with barely interested players floating through something that only vaguely resembled real hockey, expectations for the weekend could hardly have been lower. Anything better than "terrible" would have been considered a victory.

Instead, we got something that was—dare I say it—actually good. Like, legitimately entertaining. I know, I'm as stunned as you are. Sunday's win by the Pacific Division, which earned a 1-0 victory over the Atlantic in the final of the new format's mini-tournament, closed the curtain on a weekend that mostly worked.

With the NHL schedule on hold for the better part of a week, there's not much point in doing a new round of the regular weekly power rankings. So instead, let's borrow the format and apply it to All-Star Weekend, with a countdown of the five best and worst stories from the past few days in Nashville.

The five highlights of NHL All-Star Weekend.

5. Gary Bettman: The commissioner typically spends All-Star Weekend making a variety of public appearances. By design, they rarely generate much in the way of news. But fresh off a recent extension, Bettman raised a few eyebrows late last week when he dropped this quote:

Bettman: 'I don't get that booed anymore… because if you are a fan you realize the game is pretty good.'

— Rick Westhead (@rwesthead)January 29, 2016

This is, of course, completely ridiculous. Bettman's last major appearance in front of NHL fans was the draft in Florida, at which he was booed. More recently, he appeared at the Glen Sather ceremony in Edmonton, where he was booed, and at the Sharks' 25th anniversary celebration, where he was booed.

I mean… this is a bit now, right? Bettman is winking at us, pretending to play along with the whole booing thing in an obviously fake and over-the-top way. The whole "the game is pretty good" quote—coming right in the midst an ongoing era of low-scoring, low-intensity hockey—is the giveaway. Bettman is messing with us.

And, if so, here's hoping he really runs with it. The next time he's getting showered with boos at an NHL arena, he should make a big show of acting confused, making exaggerated "What's going on?" gestures while egging fans on. Maybe even grab a mic and ask everyone why they're chanting for this guy. Really steer into the skid.

I'm telling you, it will be gold. Gary Bettman, comedic genius. Who knew?

(Either that or he's going deaf. I'm really hoping it's the first option.)

4. Nashville: The All-Star Game doubles as an opportunity for the host city to show off a bit. If you're a longstanding hockey hotbed, that means breaking out the history. If you're what we'd politely refer to as "non-traditional market" that means a chance to show you belong in front of a hockey world that's probably looking at you at least a little bit skeptically.

Recent history has leaned heavily toward that latter group of hosts, with cities like Dallas, Raleigh and even Atlanta getting a turn in the spotlight. Last year was Columbus, and other than almost killing everyone in the press box with that ridiculous cannon, it did a fantastic job.

That brings us to this year, and by all accounts, Nashville hit it out of the park. The city has always been known as one of the league's underrated fun destinations, and it embraced that reputation throughout the week. The game was surrounded with a mix of everything, from the predictable (lots of events for kids) to the clichéd (a little too much country music) to the bizarre (the, um, cheese fountain). The fan fair sounds like it was a hit. Heck, there was even a great crowd for that awkward red carpet the league insists on doing.

Not everything worked—we'll get to that weird Friday night thing in a minute—but enough of it did that Nashville gets a solid thumbs up. And hockey fans got another reminder that you don't need 100 years of history in your back pocket to enjoy the game.

3. P.K. Subban: Subban broke out his Jaromir Jagr impression to win Saturday night's breakaway contest with a performance so impressive that he somehow managed to beat out two adorable children and Chewbacca.

And here's the thing: He was even better than you probably remember. For one, while the mullet was nice, the real attention-to-detail genius was the Jofa helmet. And the Jagr routine managed to make everyone forget about Subban's first attempt, which was just ridiculous.

I'll say it again: Subban is the greatest and if you don't love him then there's something seriously wrong with you. Yes, Bruins fans, I'm talking to you.

2. The new format: It worked. The NHL took a gamble by switching everything over to 3-on-3, in the hopes that the open ice would fix (or at least disguise) some of the problems that have plagued the game over the years. It was no sure thing—at its best, 3-on-3 can be lots of fun, but at its worst all that extra space just means sloppy play and loose pucks sliding sadly off to nowhere. But to its credit, the league took a shot, and it was rewarded.

The three games played out very differently; one high-scoring, one low-scoring, and one that was just right. There were plenty of breakaways and odd-man rushes, but not so many that it got completely ridiculous. The open ice meant that speed and skill ruled the day, which is what you want in this sort of game.

And best of all, the players tried. Not all that much, but enough that it felt like hockey again. Heck, some of them were legitimately busting their behinds. Maybe the million dollars on the line helped, maybe the 3-on-3 format made it impossible to hide a truly awful effort, or maybe the players finally realized that they were the reason that fans had grown to hate the game. Whatever it was, they tried. And it led to some really enjoyable hockey.

1. John Scott: Who else could it be?

At this point, you already know the story of how he got there, and chances are you had strong feelings about whether or not that was a good thing. But let's put that aside, because by the time the weekend arrived, the matter was already settled. Scott was going to be there, and he was going to play. The only question left was whether his presence would help or hurt.

The answer: Yeah, it turned out pretty well.

Scott drew a big crowd at media day, charming reporters and even snapping their picture. He got a loud ovation when he was introduced before Saturday's Skills Competition. He didn't look out of place when he competed in the hardest shot and shootout events (but weirdly, not in the breakaway contest, which you'd think everyone could have had a ton of fun with.) Through the weekend's first few days, he was stealing the show.

And as it turned out, all of that was just the warmup.

On Sunday, he scored twice, threw the game's only hit, got into a fake fight, and lit up Jeremy Roenick, Patrick Roy-style. Then he won the MVP award, despite being left off of the official ballot, and his teammates carried him off the ice. It was great. The whole darn thing was great.

And, no, maybe it wasn't perfect. Did some of the weekend's early pro-Scott sentiment feel forced, maybe even mawkishly overboard? Sure. Was it weird that we all pretended that the whole Players' Tribune thing was anything other than a transparently ghost-written PR play? Probably. Was his stunning MVP win actually not all that stunning at all, given the circumstances? Sort of. Does the feel-good aspect take a bit of a hit when you remember that the guy still had to endure a cross-continent trade that the NHL may have secretly orchestrated? Um… let's change the subject.

Despite all that, Scott ended up being a near-perfect addition to the proceedings. He gave us something to talk about, the fans embraced him, and he and his family seemed to enjoy themselves. There was little if any hint of the mean-spiritedness that marked much of the ballot-stuffing campaign that got him elected in the first place. He certainly wasn't any kind of embarrassment, either on or off the ice. He was fun, which is supposed to be the weekend's whole point.

Whatever your feelings about how we got here, it was impossible not to cheer him on once the weekend arrived. Once you did, he delivered. And somehow, against all odds, the hallowed integrity of the noble All-Star Game remains intact. At least for one more year.

Narrowly missing the top five: This year's uniforms not being completely terrible; Patrick Kane getting booed and Scott laughing in his face about it; Cory Schneider and Roberto Luongo twisting the knife on Canucks fans by fake fighting over the goal crease; every shot of Scott's mom; the presence of tiny adorable children like Scott's daughters, Brent Burns and Joe Pavelski's sons, and Johnny Gaudreau; the replies to this tweet.

The weekend's five worst decisions and dumbest moments.

5. A 1-0 final: Are bigger nets the answer to the NHL All-Star Game's dead puck era? MY COLUMN:

No, just kidding. The final game was great, the best of the three. I'm just having trouble coming up with five things that were legitimately bad about the weekend.

4. Predator overload: The NHL has an annoying habit of taking an All-Star Game that's supposed to be an international showcase for the league's best and instead turning it into a local event, where everything is aimed at the hometown fans. That's how you get rosters overstuffed with local players, hometown stars winning MVPs that they don't deserve, and guys like Nick Foligno being front and center as team captains.

Despite the new format, this year's game still featured the traditional roster-stuffing, with the fifth-place Predators getting a league-high four representatives. One of those, James Neal, was a late replacement, so maybe you give the league a break there—asking a local to stick around for the weekend is probably a better plan than yanking some poor guy off a beach. But Pekka Rinne? Come on.

Yes, you want to make sure the local fans enjoy the weekend. That's what the concerts and fan fests are for. The roster-stuffing routine is overkill, and subtracts some prestige from an honor that barely has any left to begin with. And it's more than a little bit insulting, as if fans in certain markets can't enjoy a game unless they're being spoon fed platitudes about how their favorite team is the very bestest ever. Knock it off, NHL.

3. Dylan Larkin's fake record: The Red Wings' rookie sensation dominated Saturday's fastest skater competition, posting the best time in the main event and earning a chance to challenge Mike Gartner's all-time record for a full lap. He went on to shatter Gartner's mark by almost three tenths of a second.

But wait! As the replay shows (and as Sportsnet's Nick Kypreos later pointed out on the Canadian broadcast), Larkin took off from the blue line, while Gartner had to start just one stride back of the red line. Since the clock doesn't start until the player crosses center ice, that gives Larkin a huge advantage, basically guaranteeing he'd break the record even if he stumbled along the way, which he did. The whole thing was rigged.

Clearly, this cannot stand. Gartner's mark needs to be restored in the record books. And as for Larkin, he doesn't get off the hook; let's sentence him to actually playing like a teenager every now and then instead of looking like a grizzled veteran every freaking night.

No, I didn't go into the weekend thinking I'd be pushing a Mike Gartner Truther movement, either, but here we are.

2. Draft dodgers: The NHL scrapped the Friday night All-Star fantasy draft this year, replacing it with some sort of music special that absolutely nobody watched. But if anyone had, the event would have been a letdown. There's just no replacing the fantasy draft. It was that good, and fans loved it. And so it goes without saying that, based on the league's strict "anything fans enjoy must go away" bylaws, it had to die.

The blame for that lies at the feet of the players, who felt "uncomfortable" with the draft and insisted it be scrapped. It's true that the draft wouldn't have worked with this year's division-based format, although that hardly matters; nobody really cares about the divisions anymore, so it's not like having four captains draft four teams wouldn't have worked just fine.

It's understandable why the players wouldn't want the event to continue. It's understandable why the league was willing to give in. But for a weekend that's already so low on entertainment value that plenty of fans have been suggesting it be scrapped altogether, the draft was one of the few highlights.

1. The no-shows: This has been a recurring problem for years—players just don't want any part of the event. It's hard to blame them, since by this time of year most of them are beat up and exhausted and could use a weekend off. But the All-Star Game doesn't really work without, well, All-Stars.

This year's event was missing two of the league's five biggest names, as both Alexander Ovechkin and Jonathan Toews bowed out due to injury or illness. Jaromir Jagr didn't want to play, either, although he eventually did show up. Both Ovechkin and Toews will now be suspended one game, thanks to a rule the NHL had to implement a few years ago after it became obvious that anyone with so much as a paper cut was going to pull a no-show if they could get away with it.

Players skipping the All-Star Game is one of those frustrating problems that doesn't really give you anyone to blame. You can't be mad at Toews or Ovechkin, who clearly do need some time off. You can't blame anyone who'd rather take a vacation than go to work, since you'd do the same. You can't even attack the league for the automatic suspension rule, since it still needs to make sure enough players show up to fill out a roster.

So here's my proposal: Starting next year, John Scott is in charge of enforcing All-Star Game attendance. If any of the league's best players seem like they don't want to go, we send Scott to have a little chat with them. He explains how much fun the weekend can be, tells them a few stories of his own experience, maybe even shows them a photo or two. And if after all that they still decline, Scott nods, tells them that he understands their perspective, and then quietly slips off the hockey gloves he's been wearing for the entire conversation.

Boom. All-Star Weekend, now featuring a 100 percent participation rate. You can thank me later, NHL.

Narrowly missing the bottom five: Schneider stopping Scott's spin-o-rama attempt on Saturday, and Drew Doughty not getting him the puck for an empty-net hat trick on Sunday; the fact that absolutely nobody understands how the Skills Competition scoring works; having four teams but only bothering to design two uniforms; a goal getting waved off by a coach's challenge, although at least it wasn't on a play that was offside by a fraction of an inch; how Don Maloney will feel when the Habs get a decent asset in a few days by trading Scott to a small-market team that wants to market the hell out of the league's most popular player.