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The U.S. Department of Defense Hates Butt-Rock, Apparently

Korn, Nickelback, and Creed were classified as "Terrible Rock Groups" in an internal memo.

by Phil Witmer
Feb 17 2017, 9:00pm

The work playlist is important. One cannot mess it up, lest your colleagues judge you for an eternity. This ethos seems to go all the way up to the U.S. Department of Defense. Now, one could argue the DoD have more important matters to attend to, but such is life. As reported by Exclaim!, a tweet by journalist Geoffrey Ingersoll reveals an internal memo from the DoD dated February 14th (big day for post-grunge) specifying "Terrible 'Rock Groups'" that are not to be played in the command post.

This may or may not be real, but who can truly hate Smash Mouth or Slipknot? The former only wants to stroll on cosmic balls of gas, while the latter is from Iowa and we're editorially required not to say anything bad about Iowa, even if all they have is this band and maize. Speaking of which, Korn is influential and if you don't feel your soul leave your body when Jonathan Davis screams "FUCK ALL THAT BULLSHIT!!!!" and the riff comes in on "Justin" then I don't know what to say, man. As for Creed... They're not a band anymore? Sick.

Phil is a Noisey staff writer. He's on Twitter.