For Some Reason Someone's Made a Trainer That's Also a Drum Machine

Tech! Fashion! We love it! Find us the nearest cliff!

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May 4 2017, 9:41am

Do you ever find yourself looking around the world and thinking "why?" Just why. Not necessarily why are we here, or why do we exist, or why are we no closer to understanding exactly what happens after we pass away and the maggots have succored on our flesh and all that is left of us is snapped tendons and bone marrow; just "why?"

Right now, I am asking that very same simple question. The reason that I'm sat here with my head in my hands is thus: for reasons that'll hopefully never be fully revealed, a team of New York based creatives had made a "fully functional" 808 drum machine trainer. Why? Why? WHYI?

The souped-up Adidas high-top shoe was brought into an un-asking world by Neely & Daughters, a creative agency who decided that what everyone really needs right now, is a shoe that's also a drum machine. Isn't that brilliant? Isn't that just fucking amazing? Think about how brilliant that is for a second: a drum machine that is a shoe.

Have you ever wanted to replicate the sounds of an old drum machine that's been fetishised out of all proportion as you walk to the local Costcutter for a tin of chicken in a white sauce and a bumper book of crosswords?

No, didn't think so.

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