Kevin Kiermaier Fouls a Ball Straight Into His Jungle Buttons

Boy, howdy, Kevin Kiermaier, you've really gone and done it this time. You done gone slapped that baseball straight into your thunder hutch. We're talking a redirected fastball caroming right into your chowder biscuits. Oh, that's definitely a 2.94-inch diameter sphere veering straight for the fiesta palace. One-hundred-and-eight stitches twisting directly at your Grand Chawhee. Some cowhide conforming to the ways of your hurty gurts. Five ounces of texas tablecloth jumping straight up at your candied yams. Yup, that right there is 9.2 inches of circumference meeting you and your inlaws for breakfast, if you know what I mean. Ai-yai-yai.

Side note: he was ok, and stayed in the game like a champ.