One Man's Heroic Quest to Recreate Storied Rivalry Using Dead Chipmunks

Dead chipmunks can play football.

Jul 30 2015, 10:05pm

A Michigan man collected 22 dead chipmunks from wherever people find dead chipmunks, put miniature dead chipmunk football helmets on them, and arranged them on a miniature dead chipmunk football field, where the dead chipmunk Michigan State Spartans defeated the dead chipmunk Michigan Wolverines for the rest of chipmunk eternity.

Taxidermist and dead chipmunk football mastermind Nick Saade is selling the replica game for $1,500, along with other dead rodent items like a dead muskrat sitting in a chair and holding a can of miniature Miller High Life.

However, should $1,500 be too much for your dead chipmunk football budget, or should you be wary of guests entering your home and asking why the prominent feature of your living room is the frozen corpses of 22 dead chipmunks bizarrely arranged on a football field, the Lansing State Journal has graciously provided a link where you can instead purchase a photo of said dead chipmunks.

That's right, for only $18.34, you could have a 15-ounce mug graced with an aerial shot of a dead chipmunk Jeff Smoker finding a dead chipmunk Charles Rogers in the back of the endzone for a dead chipmunk touchdown, thereby sinking the championship dreams of dead chipmunk Jim Harbaugh's dead chipmunk Michigan Wolverines. Why would you not want this?