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Zero Context

VICE Without Context: 'I Replied with a Picture of My Dog's Ass and Said Yes'

VICE.com's most memorable lines from the week of April 3, presented with no context.

by Alex Norcia
Apr 9 2017, 4:00am

Image by Lia Kantrowitz for VICE

As copy editor of VICE.com, it's my job to read every word that appears on our Webby Awardwinning site and make sure everything is in its right place—that all the commas and semicolons are where they need to be, names and places are spelled correctly, and "fuccboi" is written in the proper style. Over the course of the day, some sentences from our stories catch my eye—usually because they're good or funny or odd or compelling in some way. Often they're about sex. Here they are now, presented with zero context, for the week of April 3. To find out why they exist or how they were used, simply click the link for the full story. 

- I replied with a picture of my dog's ass and said yes.

I've been comfortable with women helping me use the washroom for many years.

The minute they say ma'am, you're screwed.

Why do these days exist?

In it, children lie naked on the floor in their own feces and moaning.

That is the payoff when you find something worth working toward and succeed: darkness, an underground sanctuary, the flesh of a young cow in your mouth whenever you want it.

People don't like thinking about death.

- He's also been arrested for bringing a gun to the airport.

I too have buried many existential questions under the Cheesecake Factory menu.

I guess the fat kid from Stand by Me will have to figure out another way to make it.

- So you can imagine a graduation speaker is not gonna be giving this nugget of wisdom and then saying, "And this is from Henry Stanley Haskins, the disbarred trader."

- The only reason he became a pirate was because England took away the one thing he cherished most: his boyfriend.

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