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Photo: Composite by VICE Staff

A Shopping Guide for Foot Fetishists, Toe Suckers, and Funk Sole Lovers

What are the best sex toys out there for the foot-amorous? Ticklers, lotions, and a penetrable plastic foot are titillating places to start.
MF
New York, US
May 12, 2021, 8:05pm

“[Serious] People who have a foot fetish, what is it about the foot that intrigues you so much?” 

So posited a humble Reddit user, years ago, in the thread that keeps on giving. “If you think about it, it's not really so strange for feet to be erogenous,” one foot lover replied. “like butts and genitals, they are rarely displayed openly; even if someone is wearing sandals or barefoot, they're still standing on their soles, so they're just not seen as frequently as other body parts. This makes them almost as much of a ‘private’ part.” It’s in the softness of feet. It’s about sensitivity to touch, and the potential for erogenous pleasure. “Some people dig shoes, or stockings; some folks are all about getting stepped on, etc.” If it rubs you the wrong way, that’s OK. But if you find yourself a tad intrigued on how to explore foot fantasy? Come hither. 

If you’re not sure where to start on your foot-loving journey, Sofia Barrett-Ibarria recently wrote up a beginner’s guide to getting handsy feety with your partner for VICE. Have a fireside chat with your lover(s), and find out if this [rolls down stocking] is something y’all are into (or could be into), and heed Barrett-Ibarria’s advice on how to knock your foot fetishizing partner’s socks off. It is, indeed, not a “one-size fits all” fetish. As with your leg hands, there’s always room for you and your partner to grow and learn more about one another. What excites them, and you? Foot foreplay? Foot grooming and pampering? As Barrett-Ibarria explains, something like “asking for a foot rub—or offering one—can provide a natural way to continue the conversation about specific preferences you or your partner might have.” 

The research on why people have foot fetishes isn’t substantial, sadly, as VICE contributor Grant Stoddard explored in 2018, speaking with New York-based psychotherapist (a.k.a. kink doctor) Dulcinea Pitagora. “While research on the topic is, as Pitagora suggests, scarce,” Stoddard wrote, “a 2007 study published in the International Journal of Impotence Research found that among those professing to having a fetish, feet were the most common preferences for body parts or features and objects usually associated with the body. Fully 47 percent of fetish groups subscribers in the sample the study looked at were into feet.” Not a small number! 

Stoddard, himself a foot fetishizer, also offered some inside knowledge on the kink. “I like feet. I’m turned on by many other body parts too—pretty much all of them in fact,” he wrote, “But it’s my unabashed fondness for feet that has garnered the most remarks from partners. Some are bemused by the level of attention I give their trotters, while others are delighted to have their toes and soles sniffed and kissed.” He goes on to cite the many variations of those with foot fetishes like to interact with their feet of choice—and there are far more acts than the un-kinky might expect.. “[There are] the foot-jobbers, the people who like to be penetrated—vaginally, anally, orally—by a foot, people into stockings, folks who are into shoes and many other foot-related fetishes,” he explained.You just have to try the kink on for size. You know, dip a pinkie toe in. 

You could be lubing your partner’s toes at this very moment, for the very first time. Or perhaps you’re part of a longstanding, Rosicrucian order of foot lovers. Here are 14 podiatric playthings to help you turn on, tune in, and toe out. 

Remember the Vajankle?

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But like, would a foot vagina be on the top of a foot, or the bottom? [Takes another hit.] We have a lot of questions about all the ways you can fuck a foot, my jabroni, and while the iconic Vajankle leans towards the top, this foot masturbator says “Bottoms up!”

BESTOYARD Male Masturbator Realistic Foot Pocket, $85.99 at Amazon

Print and hang this in the kitchen

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Photo: Etsy

The next time you have a horny, vaxxed dinner party, make sure this piece is placed by the whipped cream for the strawberry shortcake. It’s a reproduction of a kinky, 1980s Japanese print that is now available to you, for your printing or emailing pleasure, in a HQ, digital format (another clever way to get cool, expensive-looking wall art for cheap).

Foot Fetish Lesson (Digital Download), $5 at Etsy 

“Oh, my stars and garters!”

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… Is what your well-toed lover will declare, mid-Judy Garland roleplay. Good thing these thigh-high, Parisian-designed fishnets don’t need a garter, though, so you can easily slide them right over those piping hot foot knuckles with ease. 

Oh La La Cherie Lingerie Fishnet Thigh High With Lace Top, $17.99 $11.19 at Ella Paradis 

This might get you foot-punched in the face

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… But maybe that’s part of your kink! A tickler is a toe-pleasing classic. Plus, is there anything more elegant than a single, lone feather on the arch of your lover’s foot? So Victorian. So Clue (the movie). No wonder it has five out of five stars on Lovehoney. 

Bondage Boutique Luxury Ostrich Feather Tickler, $16.99 at Lovehoney

This callus remover has 24K+ glowing reviews

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Photo: Amazon

You’re going to want a clean slate (unless you want a dirty one, which is cool), so sand off those well-earned calluses with this top-rated pedicure tool. “This is the best [money] I have spent in a long time,” writes Shiva S. “This little machine turned out to function way better than I had anticipated. I have had a very large and painful callus on the ball of my left foot from years of dancing. I have tried to treat it with Dr. Scholl's medicated pads and it never has worked [...] on the 1st use there is only 10% left of the callus, it was almost entirely gone and I haven't felt that kind of relief in years.”

Electric Feet Callus Removers, $25.99 $22.99 at Amazon

You want soft feet, but have like, $10 to spend

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On the heels of your foot buffing, massage this deeply hydrating lotion in your feet, and let it sink in overnight by sliding them into a pair of tube socks. (Yum.) This silky balm contains mega-softening ingredients and botanical dreamboats like macadamia oil, menthol, bilberry, orange, lemon fruit acid smoothers—you know, all the good stuff from the farmers market. 

Soap & Glory Heel Genius, $10 at Ulta

You want soft feet, and have a ~moderate~ budget

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Photo: Amazon

This brand boldly claims to not just hydrate the heel, but reinvent the heel, and we’re along for the ride. “Best foot cream EVER!!” writes one reviewer of the top-rated product, “Not greasy at all!!! Been my go too for as long as it's been ‘alive’!!!” We have some questions as to why “alive” is in quotes, but no worries. (Some worries.) Mostly, excited to feel something. 

Origins Reinventing The Heel Mega-Moisture For Dry, Cracked Feet, $40.46 $30.00 at Amazon

Picture it...

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Photo: Etsy

“Clean feet, painted nails, muddy feet, dirty feet, oily feet, socks on, shoes on, feet in bath, feet on grass, feet in paint etc.” are all on the table at Twinkle Toes Babe’s Etsy shop. All photos are made to order, with a turnaround of two to five days before reaching your inbox. 

15 Digital Foot Photos of Your Choice, $14.75 at Etsy

Hogtie those puppies

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In the Venn diagram of kinky shiz, foot play and restraints—be it through rope bondage or Velcro—go together like a TJ’s goat cheese log and hot honey (which would also be fun to drizzle on feet??). This bondage set is easy to use, very stashable, and designed to be extra soft, because chafing is not an option here. 

Bondage Boutique Soft Rope Hogtie, $24.99 at Lovehoney

It’s a joke (but also a hint)

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Photo: Etsy

Haha! Haha! [Slides toe over yours under the table]

These Toes Ain't Gonna Suck Themselves, $19.99 at Etsy

Foot in mouth

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Photo: Etsy

Imagine: You wake up on a lazy Sunday, pour a hot cup of Café Bustelo for you and your lover when—alas! That’s not a spoon. It’s a chocolate toe, and it’s stirring more than just oat milk for the both of you. As much as we believe Willy Wonka had an unseen factory corner for podiatry chocolates (100%), you’re not likely to find these on just any shelf. Bless the Etsy ~confectionaire~ who gets you (and yes, you can decide if you want them with or without “nail polish”).

Large Chocolate Foot, starting at $14.99 at Etsy

Flaunt that dorsal, baby

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We were today-years-old (pardon the cheugy expression) when we learned that the “dorsal” is the name for the top of one's foot (which kind of makes us feel like a dolphin, but that’s a kink dive for another day). These bijoux are inspired by the razzle dazzle of 1920s cabaret, and just imagine how great they’ll look doing the Charleston on someone’s penis. 

Bijoux Indiscrets Magnifique Feet Chain, $44.99 at Babeland

Tangled up in blue balls

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Photo: Nordstrom

As a rule of thumb (and big toe), “Schutz shoes feature high-quality leathers [and] signature styles include two-strap heels, gladiator sandals, caged stilettos and espadrille wedges.” [Grins in Beavis and Butt-head.] They also make a nice “chained” heel.

Schutz Heyde Ankle Tie Sandal, $97.95 at Nordstrom

Bound to win 

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Photo: Etsy

Is your happy place the intersection between foot stuff and BDSM? Wrap those little paws up tight in these faux-leather restraining booties while you bust out your arsenal of ticklers, taunters, and teasers, then liberate your toesies when the moment is right. 

Foot Fetish Restraining Booties, $34.20 at Etsy

Put your feet up

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Photo: 1stDibs

Imagine the possibilities of having feet, on feet, on feet—so meta. So arty. If you own this foot, you definitely have thick-rimmed, round glasses and spend a lot of time in museum gift shops. Foot fetish or not, this is a great designer piece for getting into the rising trend resurgence of oversized, 1980s maximalist decor

Original Sculpture/ Seat Designed by Gaetano PESCE, B&B Italia, $2,780.84 at 1stDibs

These boots were made for a lot more than walking.


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