For those of us who still have the biggest crush on Patra, it's time to move on. Jamaica's got a new rudegal sex goddess, and her name is Ms. Thing. And she's 17 years old. And she's pregnant. You've heard her win everybody's heart by singing, "I want a dude who will do me in his van, I want a dude who will tie me to the fan," on Beenie Man's Spring Break banger "Dude," but don't get it twisted. Shortie's focused. On the education of the baby boy she's expecting in November, that is.
VICE: How are the schools in Jamaica?
Ms. Thing: Well, I got a good education, for real. I used to go to Tivoli Gardens High School. My favorite subject is definitely English. I'm not really the math type. I couldn't finish school, though, because I had to go on tour. So I took evening classes on the side. Now I'm all done. Education is really good, you understand me? Young girls, when they're not educated, they do the things you're not supposed to be doing. You see them selling their bodies or whatever.
Let's say you could talk to your unborn son right now. What would you say to properly educate him?
First, I would tell him that school is a must, right? I'll be behind him like a hawk. Here in Jamaica, it's harder to get a job if you're a boy. And as a man, if you don't have a job, you might go kill and steal to get whatever you want. Three-quarters of the men don't have a good education here, so they drop out and do bad things like stealing, hanging around and smoking marijuana, because they have nothing more productive to do. Then, if they go into the workplace covered in scars, they cannot get a job. The boss will say, "You look like a thief." That's why you've got to work for your own. And if you have a likkle talent on the side, that's good too.
Right, but let's face it: His mother is the most talented deejay in the country. The kid is going to be a superstar. What are you going to say when he tells you he wants to be an artist?
I'll say, "No, finish school first, let me see all your degrees, and then let me think about it." You see, music is a mixture of influences for children here in Jamaica. Some entertainers say to pick up guns, some say not to pick up guns. If you continuously have entertainers talking about guns, the children will fall into that boat. You heard about Capleton? You know how he's always shouting, "More fire! More fire!" This young boy, he lit his mother's shop on fire, and when the police asked him why he did that, he said, "Because Capleton shouts, ‘More fire!'"
Ms. Thing's debut Miss Jamaica is out now on Sequence Records.