Skinema
One-Night Stands
Not one day passes that I don't crave the open air of a strange and new place, wanting to find myself in inexplicable predicaments on foreign soil and barely escaping with my life.
Obedience School
Have you ever tried to mop up the floodwaters of a squirter? FEMA and the Red Cross combined would be ill-equipped to handle the task; there just aren't enough sandbags on earth to hold back those tides.
Gimme a Fucking Break #4
Despite flunking out of six of the most prestigious institutions of higher learning in New Jersey in less than three years, I never got to experience the crazy beach rompfest marinated in cheap beer that is spring break.
Superman vs. Spider-Man: A Porn Parody
The most successful major motion pictures in recent years have been superhero movies, and the most lucrative pornos over the past five years have been spoofs, so it's no surprise that there have been a shit-ton of superhero spoofs lately.
No Warning 7: Ambushed
When I arrived back home in New Jersey the airport was full of fearful folk running around with their hands above their heads, doing the Steve Martin and screaming, "The sky is falling! The sky is falling!"
The Dark Knight XXX: A Porn Parody
Just as hip-hop died outside the Petersen Automotive Museum in Los Angeles, so did her big beautiful breasts in 1997. I'm no Columbo but I've seen a lot of episodes of Law & Order, and I can't help but wonder if the two crimes are somehow related.