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Which Neko Atsume Cat You Are, According to Your Zodiac Sign

Because you absolutely must know if you're a Lady Meow-Meow or Billy the Kitten.
Beautiful art by Leila Ettachfini

Remember the sweet days of Neko Atsume? The cat-collecting app, released in 2014, has all the elements of a perfect game: soothing music, shopping, and tiny cartoon kitties.

The objective of the game is to obtain toys and food, which you use to decorate your home to optimize its cat-appeal. Once you fill your yard with goodies, you lure new feline friends, who languish around your home, moving back and forth like mini-gifs. Each player is equipped with an index that provides crucial information about every cat in the game: their names, appearances, and a one-word description of their personalities. As the cats hang out in your home, you take photos of them to add to your cat index and grow your collection. Then, like all things you love, you let the cats go.

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Everything about the game is perfect—it is a calm, brief slice of the many-splendored, impermanent enigma of joy.

If you've found yourself wanting to revisit the game to cope with life in our bleak, worsening world, here's your chance to carry these digital kitties with you today. I present to you: the signs as rare Neko Atsume cats:

Libra: Ms. Fortune

Appearance: Gold

Personality: Charismatic

Ruled by Venus, the planet of love and beauty, Libras are known for being trendy, charming, and flirty as hell—all the elements for a gold and charismatic rare cat!

Scorpio: Señor Don Gato

Appearance: Mustachioed

Personality: Scheming

Scorpios are intense water signs who are maligned nearly as often as Geminis. They're known for being sex-obsessed instigators who live for drama, so this cat's scheming ways are a natural match.

Sagittarius: Sassy Fran

Appearance: Waitress

Personality: Enthusiastic

The know-it-all of the zodiac, fire sign Sagittarius loves to use whatever they have in their toolbox to help people in all kinds of problems. Though they mean well, their optimism can be overbearing—hence their delegation as Sassy Fran.

Capricorn: Joe DiMeowgio

Appearance: Baseball Jersey

Personality: Team Player

Often roasted as wet blankets, Capricorns are earth signs known for working hard and playing by the rules….not unlike Joe DiMeowgio.

Aquarius: Saint Purrtrick

Appearance: Ethereal

Personality: Awe-Inspiring

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Described as "the alien of the zodiac," air sign Aquarius is known for doing things their own way. They're out of this world—ethereal, if you will.

Pisces: Sapphire

Appearance: Classic Siamese

Personality: Naive

Pisces, the tender, flakey fish (mmm) tends to live in their feelings—which is also why they can be easy targets for manipulators.

Aries: Lady Meow-Meow

Appearance: American Shorthair

Personality: Diva

Fire sign Aries loves the finer things in life—and won't settle for any less! That's why they're basically the Neko Atsume-equivalent of Anna Wintour.

Taurus: Guy Furry

Appearance: Apron

Personality: Artisan

Taurus, ruled by love and beauty planet Venus, is also an earth sign, which means that they feel grounded and at home when they're cozied up with their favorite—and often fancy—things. Artisan indeed!

Gemini: Ramses the Great

Appearance: Sphinx

Personality: Riddler

Though they're often slandered as two-faced, Gemini's ability to switch allegiance is rooted in the fact that it's a cerebral air sign able to see many sides of any situation. Geminis are known for being chatty—and they'll always keep you on your toes.

Cancer: Frosty

Appearance: Straw Coat

Personality: Sensitive

Though fellow water sign Pisces is most roasted for being a crybaby, Cancers are actually the most sensitive sign!!

Leo: Xerxes IX

Appearance: Persian

Personality: Regal

Leo, the narcissistic fire sign who has the best hair in your friend group, is ruled by the sun—which is why they think they're the center of the universe!

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Virgo: Billy the Kitten

Appearance: Western Wear

Personality: Nihilistic

Earth sign Virgo is known for being an analytical over-thinker, which can easily spiral into a constant, low-grade pessimism. Look at this lil nihilistic cutie!!