Fail Spectacularly in 'Handle With Care'

Failure feels bad. It feels bad in life and it feels bad in games. But there's a certain category of failure that doesn't. It's the kind of failure you get after spending 10 minutes meticulously observing NPC patterns in Hitman, then slyly planting a proximity mine along your target's route only to have it triggered by some random bystander who's panicking after finding a body you happened to leave around the corner. That's perfect failure, when the manner in which you fail (complex or simple) is just so excruciatingly perfect that you can't help but appreciate its beauty.

Perfect failure is also what made my first experience with slapstick museum tragedy game Handle With Care so memorable. It was one simple disaster that unfolded just right.

I had picked up one of the three target vases I needed to place deeper inside the museum. My first mistake was picking it at random rather than scouting the path I would have to take beforehand. Each one required that I navigate a series of pillars with artifacts balanced precariously upon them, while also balancing something precariously myself. But of course I hadn't chosen the vase with a relatively straight shot to its intended display in the back. No no. I had picked the vase that was meant to go on the mezzanine above, up at the other end of a slowly twisting ramp, the path towards which was naturally still littered with even more teetering exhibits.

In spite of that, things went well at first. I threaded the needle. I swayed and corrected to keep my cargo in check. I proceeded, one foot in front of the other.

It was a graze, really. As I rounded the base of the ramp I cut things just a hair too close and held my breath as a particularly tall piece with a particularly narrow base swayed just beside me. Swayed, but didn't fall. An audible "phew." I exhaled and carried on up the ramp.

The ramp wasn't easy. My character was struggling, sticking his legs out at all angles to brace himself as he turned and straightened and turned and straightened. But it was going well.

And then the crash below. Well behind me. So delayed that there was a moment of pure surprise where I couldn't think of what had happened followed immediately by a moment of pure dread when I knew. I couldn't even be mad about it. It was just too perfect.

Pay what you want for Handle With Care or download it free for Mac, Windows and Linux on itch.io.