Mourinho Gets Absolutely Embarrassed in Return to Chelsea with Manchester United

It's hard to know where to begin with Chelsea's dismantling of Manchester United today. Oh, wait. No it's actually pretty easy. Let's just try 30 seconds in, for good measure.

Today was billed as the first return of The Special One to Stamford Bridge after his legendary flame-out with Chelsea last season. And maybe he thought that he would ride in and steal a game, with his Zlatan-gilded squad of disjointed youth vs experience. But Chelsea had a resounding response to Mourinho: "GTFO."

The game started ominously for Mourinho, as Chelsea knocked in a breezy goal just under a half-minute into the game (above). Pedro received a lobbed pass from the left wing that trap-doored him on a run behind Manchester United's poorly-communicating back line. De Gea understandably went out to compensate for his defense's nincompoopery, but got worked as Pedro danced around him and slotted it in.

Then, a Chelsea corner in the 21st minute yielded a loose ball that Gary Cahill decided to not so daintily rocket into the back of the net:

And then, as if Mourinho's ghosts couldn't come out to haunt him any more, Eden Hazard—who had struggled to find his form under Jose's leadership—wanted it to be known that Mourinho's not the boss of him anymore. So he practically carved through half of Manchester United's defense on a one-two that will be tattooed in Chelsea fans's memories for some time now:

Even N'Golo Kante, who hadn't found net all season wanted to get in on the action to properly seal the blow-out:

Finally, Chelsea knows what it feels like to be on the other side of a Mourinho loss. The table looks pretty nice to them right now too, with MU at No. 7 and Chelsea one point away from No. 1. Blue takes red.