One day, GG Allin took his son to the park. They started tossing some shit around, and, well, things got really messy when shit hit someone in the face.
Raymond, you need to talk to your son Geoffrey. He won't stop shitting in his pants.
E.T. was roaming the street robbing homies, when he ran into a dealer and asked him for Reece's Pieces. It didn't end well, but you probably already know that, because this is Johnny Ryan's page, not some 1980s Steven Spielberg kids movie.
A while back I was looking for a series of things to vandalize and post online for laughs. I started with photos from magazines and wrestling cards, and they were OK, but I wanted something a bit more unique. Then I discovered a few Chick tracts stored...
"That's Rob Kilrape! The most vicious criminal in the city!"
"Good evening, welcome to the six o'clock Nuge. I'm Ted Nugent. Today, Ted Nugent shot a stupid chipmunk in the face. Ted Nugent is live on the scene. Ted?"
On my breaks I like to strap on these springs and bounce around the woods.
Hey Thomas, Johnny hasn't turned in his new comic yet and he's not answering his phone or email. I want you to go out to his place and see what's up.
Dr. Brewster, you have a phone call from your mother. She says it's extremely urgent. "Andrew this is your mother. I need you to give me a ride."
If you ever find yourself needing to escape a gang of sea creatures hell-bent on raping you, a whale's vagina is not the best place to hide.
Sigh... Nobody loves me...