There are many kinds of bad neighbour. The bro who swears it'll just be a "chill gathering" with a "few solid people," then plays deep house until 5 AM. Those who can't quite grasp the concept of a communal area, and leave their bike, two spare tires, and detachable pannier in the hallway for you to trip over each morning without fail. And then there's Julie-two-doors-down, who definitely knows more about your missing ASOS package than she's letting on.
But the pair who just got fined for harassment at Newcastle Magistrates Court fit into a whole other category of bad neighbour.
As the court heard this week, Alan Ward and Kirstie Ogle prank-ordered 13 takeaways to their neighbour's house in the Fenham area of the city. This happened over a ten-day period in July last year at random hours of the day and night.
Well, there are worst kinds of surprise delivery.
Prosecutor Clare Irving explained that the unsuspecting neighbour was in bed at 11.30 PM when she heard a knock at the front door: "It turned out to be a delivery driver from a takeaway. He advised the lady's son that the order had been placed for that address. Her son said that was not the case and the driver left."
Then, at 1.30 AM, a second delivery driver arrived with more food. The same thing continued to happen over the next few days.
Multiple surprise takeaways turning up at your front door may sound like a dream, but Ogle and Ward's neighbour didn't seem to think so. A statement she gave to the court read: "I have never been so nervous and paranoid. I was suspicious of everyone I know and I was accusing people wrongly of being behind the deliveries."
The victim eventually called the police and Ward and Ogle were tracked down via the mobile phone number they had used to make the orders.
They were fined £150 each for harassment and both told to pay £150 in compensation to the victim. Their defending lawyer put their actions down to "juvenile behaviour" and "unemployment making silly work for idle hands."
Guys, should you ever find yourselves with idle hands again, feel free to swing a pizza or two our way.