Amie Barrodale
Buried Alive - Part 3
I had borrowed a sleeping bag from Bharat, and had a fit of giggles thinking, "I will piss in it."
Buried Alive - Part 2
The next morning, I went to the garage to borrow a pair of rain boots. I found Bharat beside a table, oiling his rain hat.
Buried Alive - Part 1
He said something like this: "The story of the angel. Does anyone know this story? The story of the angel? Have I told you this one...?"
The Defender of Snakes
I thought of her as the defender of snakes. She was a German woman with shaggy, sandy blond hair. The first time I saw her, she was sitting with a group of paragliders at the Friends coffee shop.
Gary Fisketjon Edits Your Heroes
Gary Fisketjon is an editor at large and vice president of Knopf. Among the writers he has edited are Raymond Carver, Bret Easton Ellis, Patricia Highsmith, Cormac McCarthy, Jay McInerney, and Tobias Wolff.
We Got Out
I met these three people in a nine-story Christian church for North Korean refugees in Seoul. I don't know the church's name; the reverend told me just to call it Seoul Church.
Caged Tigers
These bobcats live in big outdoor pens (up to a quarter acre) and cat rooms in Lynn Culver's house in the mountains of West Arkansas. The ones raised from when they were little are tame, the others are "not affectionate."
Bleeding Ears
Listening to one song over and over for a prolonged period of time—especially music that's intentionally harmful and not from someone's culture—is a form of inflicting pain.
Sweet Home Alabama
The homemade weapons featured here were confiscated from students enrolled in middle and high schools in the Huntsville City School district of Northern Alabama. They were chosen from among a huge collection of weapons kept by the Huntsville Campus.
ClichÉs Are Hateful Lies
I like clichés to say in jokes, but I hate people who think they are instructive. Those people are stupid. I set out to prove it by following the clichés to the letter. Watch this...DON'T LET THE CAT OUT OF THE BAG!
100 Extra Dos & Don'ts
Had enough? No? OK, let's get The Onion's Amie Barrodale to pump out 100 more.