CAPS LOCK REVIEWS
Cappadonna' 'Eyrth, Wynd, and Fyre' Contains Approximately 8900 Bars of Rappity Rapping
THIS ALBUM IS SO LONG AND BORING HE PROBABLY GOT A CEASE & DESIST FROM EARTH WIND & FIRE (NOT THE GROUP, THE ACTUAL ELEMENTS) AND HAD TO SPELL THE SHIT WRONG AS A LEGAL LOOPHOLE.
The Strokes' 'Comedown Machine' Proves they are a Generic Rock Band, B
YO THIS ALBUM DOESNT SUCK BUT IT DOESN'T NOT SUCK...YOU FEEL ME?
Justin Timberlake's 'The 20/20 Experience' is Good, but Only Because He's in the Illuminati
I'M POPPING IN THE STREETS RIGHT NOW LAST THING I NEED IS TO BE SACRIFICIED TO AN OWL STATUE BEFORE I MAKE MY FIRST $5000.
The Kid Mero Reviewed All Three Bauuer Songs Currently on Spotify
THIS SOUNDS LIKE I BLEW 4 GRAMS OF MOLLY UP MY NASAL AND WAS INSTRUCTED TO "MAKE A SONG FOR WHITE PEOPLE USING ONLY FROOTYLOOPS AND CRIME MOB SAMPLES."
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis' 'The Heist' is Incredibly Wacklemore
WHAT IS A MACKLEMORE? THAT SHIT SOUNDS LIKE A SPECIES OF TROUT WHO NATURAL HABITAT IS THE MALL OF AMERICA.
We had The Kid Mero Review the 15-Second Daft Punk Snippet
I BET THEY WERE IN THE STUDIO LIKE "JACQUES LET UZ DO A HOW ZOO YOU SAY? EHH, "FONKI BAZE LION?" AND OTHER DUDE WAS LIKE "OUI OUI FRANCOIS ALL ZEE BEETCHES AHH.. ZAY WEEL S'EBROUER ZEE COCAINE NO?"
YG's "Just Re'd Up 2" Mixtape Is Wild Boring
I STARTED LISTENING TO THIS SHIT AND INSTEAD OF CONCENTRATING SO I COULD DELIVER A VERY WELL THOUGHT OUT KNOWLEDGEABLE REVIEW I STARTED BROWSING REAL ESTATE LISTINGS IN VERY RICH AREAS OF NEW JERSEY SO I COULD MOVE OUT THE HOOD ONCE VICE GIVES ME A MILLIO
Waka Flocka's DuFlocka Rant 2 is Pure Crack Except for One Song About College Girls or Some Shit
THANK YOU WAKA FOR STAYING IN YOUR LANE WHICH IS MAKING MUSIC TO CRASH YOUR CAR TO.
Ablebody's 'All My Everybody' EP is the Soundtrack to an Imaginary (But Very Sexual) Garden State Remake
THIS SHIT STARTED OFF WITH A VERY STRONG "SOFT FOCUS LOVEMAKING WITH WHITE COLLEGIATE YOUNG WOMAN" VIBE NOW THE VIBE IS "I'M OVERDOSING ON HEROIN OH SHIT I'M DYING I KNOW I'M DYING FUCK! BUT IT FEELS SO GOOD FUCK IT *PERISHES*"
Pig Destroyer's Live Flexi Disc for Decibel Magazine Sounds Like White People Workout Music (In a Good Way)
SHOUTOUT TO ALL THE BROS ON ELLIPTICALS LISTENING TO THIS SHIT.
Juelz Santana's "God Will'n" Mixtape Makes Me Want to Punch a Train in the Face
THIS IS THE NEW SHIT FOR YOU TO DRIVE AROUND SMOKIN WEED THEN PULL OVER OCCASSIONALLY TO BEAT A DUDE UP BECAUSE HE PUSHED YOU IN 7TH GRADE OR HE LOOKS LIKE A DUDE THAT DID.
Hollywood Undead's "Notes From The Underground" Is Extra Embarrassing Teenager Music
THIS IS A NAUSEATING COMBINATION OF KORN AND SLIPKNOT AND LINKIN PARK AND A BAG OF CIRCUMCISED DICKS.