Drew Schwartz

the internet

Please Don't Poop in a Sacred Temple at Machu Picchu

Six tourists were arrested after authorities found feces inside the UNESCO World Heritage Site's Temple of the Sun.
Drew Schwartz
5 days ago
CELEBRITIES

Al Pacino, Sylvester Stallone, and Guy Fieri Walk Into a Kitchen: An Actual Thing That Happened

We have so many questions about this friendship, and Stallone's 30-second video doesn't answer any of them.
Drew Schwartz
1.12.20
CELEBRITIES

Leo DiCaprio, Living Out the Plot of a DiCaprio Movie, Rescued a Drowning Guy

The man had apparently been treading water for 11 hours.
Drew Schwartz
1.9.20
TV

Look Into the Eyes of Werner Herzog's Funko Pop and You Will See Real Stupidity

The company that makes tiny bobbleheads of Deadpool, Pikachu, and Conan O'Brien is now paying homage to the intense filmmaker.
Drew Schwartz
1.3.20
Music

Some Guy on Twitter Is Reviewing Our Entire Albums of the Year List Again

The Noisey staff salutes you, Stan.
Drew Schwartz
12.21.19
the internet

You Can Buy a Dumb Spinning Top Like the One From 'Inception' for Just $195

ForeverSpin™ insists that their luxury toy is "a timeless, elegant piece of art that will be loved by your children’s children."
Drew Schwartz
12.19.19
CELEBRITIES

Nothing Says 'I Love You' Like Giving Your Entire Family Botox for Christmas

Kris Jenner is giving everyone facial injections this year, from her 22-year-old daughter to her 85-year-old mom.
Drew Schwartz
12.13.19
Art

Of Course Someone Ate the $120,000 Duct Tape Banana

A man pulled Maurizio Cattelan's work off a gallery wall at Art Basel, chomped into it, and called the move performance art.
Drew Schwartz
12.9.19
Internet

The Only Thing Worse Than Brand Twitter Is Horny Brand Twitter

Netflix asked companies to tweet "something you can say during sex but also when you manage a brand twitter account," and now we are in hell.
Drew Schwartz
12.7.19
best of the 2010s

A Eulogy for the Mix CD, the Best Way to Tell Someone 'I Like You'

Mix CDs have been innovated out of existence—but nothing has managed to replace how meaningful it was to make and receive them.
Drew Schwartz
11.11.19

That Animated Yeti Movie 'Abominable' Violated a Ruling by The Hague, Somehow

The kids' movie has been banned in several countries for depicting a map of the South China Sea including the controversial "nine-dash line."
Drew Schwartz
10.22.19
Film

Joker Used a Song by Convicted Pedophile Gary Glitter in One of Its Biggest Scenes

He's currently serving a 16-year prison sentence for abusing three young girls.
Drew Schwartz
10.7.19
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