If you want to talk about the modern mecca of chef's knives, a pretty large portion of chefs will agree that Japan is where it's at. This belief shouldn't come as too much of a surprise considering that a great majority of Japan's master blacksmiths shifted their attention to kitchen cutlery following the ban of katanas during the Meiji Restoration.
Japan's lauded position as the true sovereign of the chiffonade hasn't stopped one Japanese company from creating a pretty unconventional kitchen knife—one that has more in common with a waifu body pillow than a santoku or yanagiba.
Takumi Armory—a Hyōgo Prefecture–based company that is seemingly geared towards anime otaku (those with an extreme obsession for any variety of geeky subculture) and creates "weapons" for cosplayers—has unveiled what is being called "The World's First Lolita Kitchen Knife." You know, to go with your Lolita getup.
Lolita fashion is, of course, a Japanese trend known for its lace petticoats, bonnets and parasols. Knee socks and Mary Jane shoes are also pretty much de rigueur. The Gothic Lolita subculture-within-a-subculture takes this baby-meets-Victoriana style and adds slasher-red lips and smoky black eyeliner to the ensemble. Not to mention spikes, chains, and weapons á la anime.
But every endeavoring lolita or goth loli needs to cook sometimes, right? And now, thank goodness, a void in the cookware universe has been filled with the Lolita kitchen knives.
The Lappin knife has a pink handle with white stripes and a bunny-eared tip. The blade is embellished with hearts (of course), which would pair nicely with your Sweet Lolita or ama-loli styles. After all, you wouldn't want to match a pastel ensemble with a wood-handled knife, would you? The Lappin sells for a neat 168,000 yen (about US$1,500).
Not so innocent? Don't worry. The black-lace-handled, butterfly-embellished Juliette knife is clearly for the more goth Lolitas out there. It costs a bit more—198,000 yen (about $1,777)—but is well worth the price if your entire wardrobe is black and you wouldn't think of slicing your vegetables with anything that clashes with your look.
The manufacturer of these Lolita knives wants to be sure you understand that despite their very un-ergonomic design, they are indeed meant to cut vegetables and other foodstuffs: "Both the Goth Lolita and Lolita kitchen knife have excellent cutting edges. They were forge cast, so they cut cleanly. If the edge gets dull, you can get it sharpened. But don't use it for any wrist cutting please!"
Consider yourselves warned.