Nuclear Missiles vs Ass Rape

Now for years everyone has been under the impression that the world has feared the U.S and it’s military might simply because it has a huge arsenal of nuclear missiles, kinda like having a Charizard when playing Pokemon or when your mate has a bi-plane and you have a harrier jump jet in Top Trumps, you’re always going to win and no one will fuck with you, not even Russia. But I have a different theory…

I believe that this whole scary story of tens of thousands of  civilisation ending, nuclear missiles is a fabrication and is a cover up for Americas real deterrent against full scale, world war 3 style conflict or massive terrorist attack. And that deterrent ladies and gentleman is ass rape.
Ever since 9/11 the American military threw the Geneva convention out the window and were hell bent on revenge, whatever the cost, that started with invading the sheperds and farmers of Afghanistan in the vain search for Osama Bin Laden and then turning the refugee camp of Guantanamo into a Death Star styled prison camp, where all bets were off and they could get away with anything.

If you were unlucky enough to be caught as a suspected terrorist in Afghanistan, then Guantanamo would’ve been your likely destination. What’s worse though is that you’ll be classified as an ‘enemy combatant’ meaning you won’t get the basic human rights afforded to you like normal prisoners, so you should expect  extreme sexual abuse, water boarding, sleep deprivation, religious persecution, force feeding, being cut with glass and barbed wire, sprayed with pepper spray and being burnt with cigarettes. There have been hundreds of attempted suicides , four successful suicides and one suspected homicide. This place literally sounds like the worse place on earth, if I was one of the inmates I’d be praying really hard that I get 70 virgins when I die, really, really hard.

The reports coming out of Guantanamo from inmates and disillusioned guards shocked the world, mostly because the U.S were getting away with it and no one could stop them, not even the U.N. Then things got worse for the enemies of ‘freedom and democracy‘ as the poor, innocent people of Iraq were invaded because the U.S assumed they had W.M.D’s. After Dubya officially declared the war over and everything was going to be fine and dandy for everyone, the U.S military re-opened the Abu Ghraib prison, just south of Bagdhad. The prison was already infamous under Saddam’s regime, but not a military to be ever outdone, the U.S army went hog wild on the new shiny inmates and stupidly took photos, images depicted male detainees being raped by American soldiers, some as young as 15, female detainees being raped or forced to perform sexual acts on other prisoners, weird naked human pyramids, prisoners being dragged by their dicks, being pissed on, having phosphoric acid poured on them and being rode like donkeys. At least one prisoner was murdered but a cover up was enacted and the killers were safe from prosecution.

This time the world got really freaked out because correct me if I’m wrong being slowly ass raped by a redneck from Alabama is 10 million x worse than a quick and painless death from a nuclear explosion. The U.S had cottoned on years ago that it would be far too costly to ever use Nukes in terms of dollars and human cost so used a far less costly alternative and it’s no coincidence that since 9/11 the U.S  has been decreasing the seize of it’s stockpiles.
Since the outbreak off all the stories from Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo the world has been a quieter place, the so called Axis of Evil is more like a slightly disgruntled W.I meeting and successful terrorist attacks on U.S soil have numbered at nil. This is like the film Swordfish except swap killing your own people to deter terrorists you just rape some Arabs. If I were an enemy of democracy and free speech, I’d get myself down to the nearest sex shop and panic buy but plugs, yes that’s you Iran, Ahmadinejad won’t me smirking so much and cursing the West when he’s Obama’s bitch.