While Starbucks hopes that its new sous vide egg bites can save its breakfast menu, 7-Eleven is opting for an early morning item that isn't boiled inside a plastic baggie. The Texas-based convenience store chain is now serving breakfast pizza, because it wants to give you a slightly classier version of eating cold leftovers from a cardboard box.
The breakfast pizza starts with a biscuit crust, then tops it with smoked bacon, sausage, hickory smoked ham, scrambled eggs, cheddar and mozzarella cheese and—because you're probably already on Lipitor—it's covered in a peppered cream gravy. It will be available either by the slice or as an entire pie, because 7-Eleven knows that you can't hate yourself all day unless you start first thing in the morning.
"This is a hearty option for customers craving a warm breakfast in addition to their fresh-brewed cup of coffee on cold mornings," Nancy Smith, 7-Eleven's senior vice president of fresh food and proprietary beverages, said in a statement. "And it's great for sharing at the office, giving co-workers another great option from the usual box of great donuts."
Oh, Nancy. No one is sharing this. They'll be eating it as quickly as possible, while trying not to make eye contact with anyone around them.
7-Eleven decided to add this item to its menu after testing it in select markets and realizing that there's no limit to our collective love for sawmill gravy. It became the chain's second highest-selling pizza—just behind that perennial No. 1, pepperoni—and a favorite among repeat customers. (So there's proof that it doesn't kill you, at least not immediately).
7-Eleven isn't the first convenience store to offer a breakfast pizza, though. Its Midwestern competitor Kum & Go has had it on the menu since the Clinton administration. "We have offered breakfast pizza for more than 20 years," Kristie Bell, the Director of Communications for Kum & Go, told MUNCHIES. "Our recipe toppings include eggs, bacon, sausage, Canadian bacon, hash browns and cheese."
Those who love breakfast pizza can also get it at any of the twenty-odd Domino's franchises owned by Tristan Koehler in Dayton, Ohio—but those are the only Domino's locations in America that serve it.
An employee named John at the University of Dayton location confirmed to MUNCHIES that breakfast pizza was available "24 hours a day, seven days a week," before promptly hanging up on us. (The store's general manager hung up on us, too. The first rule of Breakfast Pizza is apparently "Never talk about Breakfast Pizza").
Breakfast pizza is now available in what a 7-Eleven spokesperson unhelpfully described as "participating stores." Do with this information what you will.