Age: Much more than just a number btw

Remember the “cool” drug dealer type who always had like the newest Air Max, an RS Fiesta (that wasn’t really an RS but he had alloys and stickers on it) and sold you “ten spots” of hash? Yeah, well he was a casual paedophile. It was people like him who ruined my time as a young teenage boy by going out with all the girls my age. They could not resist him. This held me back from loosing my proverbial “v plate” and made me a sexually frustrated maniac who’d jack off repeatedly to dispel the stink of desperation. But enough about me. Who were these teenage girls who were hooking up with those scumbags? Didn’t they realise that fucking dudes in their 20s was, a) unlawful and b) creepy as fuck? Well, here’s what a few of my female associates had to say on the matter (none of them wanted to put their pictures up, so I put in some images of strong female role models).

Elizabeth

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So tell me, did you date older guys as a teen?
Yes. When I was 13 I dated a 19-year-old. Then, when it was 15 and 24. Ooh wait, no, he was 25.
Okay that’s pretty weird. Why did you do that?
I guess I was developed for my age.
Hahaha, that’s what they all say.
I wanted to smooch boys and stuff and the ones my age were midgets.
Did he have a car? What was the draw?
No he did not. The long-term guy was a ‘baker’. He was fit. That was the draw.
How long did you date him for?
Two years.
Woah, so you were then 16 and he was 27?
Pretty much.
Hmmm, did he sell drugs?
What? No! He didn’t even drink!

Mary

So tell me, “casual paedophilia” i.e. when girls younger than 16 date guys in their 20s. Does this apply to you?
My boyfriends were; me 15, him 18, then me 17, him 24.
Er, you 15 him 18 is unlawful.
It is.
So why not a 15-year-old guy?
Because they all looked like kids.
There must have been benefits about dating an older guy.
Yeah course. My first boyfriend had a metallic orange Vauxhall Corsa with a personalised number plate. Oh dear.
Hahahaha.
The car is my standout memory, although as he was older and he could get me to do pretty much anything. I remember once he wanted me to flash him my boobs when I was stood on the driveway of my mum’s house. So I did. The neighbours saw.
Wow, really? Fucking awesome. Maybe I should learn to drive.
You really should.

Victoria

So, why did you date older guys before you were sixteen?
I wouldn’t say it was a conscious decision, it’s not like I have a dad complex, no one was OLD old. The first sexual experience I had was with a guy who was 18, I think I was 14.
Why weren’t you hanging with a 14-year-old guy then?
I don’t know, this guy sold weed and had a car.
Haha! Bingo!
I think he raced it, I can’t remember too well. One guy though, Rudi his name was, he had a moped and used to hang about the skate park, he told practically all the girls in our year that he loved us and then put his fingers in us all! We just wanted to go drinking and not get asked for ID I guess. I think most girls went out boozing with their older boyfriends and stuff happened that they couldn’t really remember too well. Too many WKDs.
Wow, swell guys eh?
To be fair to the rapists, they weren’t to know how old we were. We used to have conversations about driving tests or about what we got in out GCSEs in very loud voices.
You staged “adult conversations”?
Yes, we staged adult conversations. As an aside, some boy lied to me about his age lately.
Oh yeah? Go on
It was in a club and he’s all like, ‘I’m 19, I’m 19’, adds me on Facebook and he’s not. He was born in 1991.
That makes him 17.
He was nice looking though.
Imagine if he’d been 15.
Don’t, he might lie on Facebook too. He was pretty but I really hate seeing him around, I feel sick when I do.

Eileen Collins went to space. Not on a date with an older man.

Jane

So, did you date any older boys when you were still a minor?
I ALWAYS went out with older boys, always.
What was the attraction? Cars and drugs?
CAR. Always the car, never a drug dealer. I fancied this guy at school. But no one else really liked him and then he left school, got a car and everyone loved him. I used to lie to my mum and saying I was going to the youth club, I was 12 at this point, I used to go to the next village and me and my friend Katie would walk to the shops and meet him and his friend there, then we would drive to his friend’s dad’s farm. He used to do these doughnut things in his car, though I didn’t like them. Then I used to make out with him a lot, but he actually had a 14-year-old girlfriend.
Woah, so he was 19, you were 12 but he also had a 14-year-old girlfriend?
Yep.
That’s pretty gross huh? Retrospectively.
Looking back on it I can see that it probably wasn’t right.

Jane Pratt didn’t get where she is by dating undesirables.

Anne

Hey, were you ever a victim of casual paedophilia?
Sure, well, I had a thing with my boss when I was 15 and he was 32. I didn’t sex him though.
Did you know it was wrong or were you like: “Man, this guy is so cool”?
I didn’t think it was wrong at all, I thought it was funny. My mum would let me go out for drinks with him
Really? Your ma knew?
My mum just thought we were friends.
Did you ever get the impression he thought it was wrong?
Yeah. He would make us arrive places at different times, but wasn’t that sly about it. I’m pretty sure everyone knew.
What was wrong with the boys your age?
They were lame. These guys were COOL, they had tattoos and all the best weed. All the other guys that worked there asked me out too, they were on average about 28.
Did they have cars?
No cars, BMXs. I was nearly 16. I went on holiday for my birthday and lost my virginity. When I came back he was all like, “you seem different” he didn’t like it. Oh and he also had a son, a 4-year-old son.
Looking back does it creep you out?
Yeah, I think it’s really weird, I still bump in to him sometimes.
Does he still give you the eye?
Nah, maybe I’m too old for him now.

Diana

So, older guys, how did you manage it before 16?
I never used to tell anyone how old I was you see.
That seems to be a recurring theme, but I think some guys know how old you all are they just pretend you’re telling the truth.
This guy was like 30. We weren’t really dating, it’s an ongoing fling. I was 15 when we met.
Really? Does he now know how old you were now?
I don’t think so.
What about 16-year-old boys, what was wrong with them, didn’t you feel for their virginal strife?
Nothing’s wrong with them, it’s just a fact that girls mature faster.
Really?
Yeah.
Scientifically proven?
Yeah, physically and mentally.
Did the 30-year-old groom you?
No. It was consensual, I initiated it really. My last boyfriend was 23. We lived together. Above his nan. Anyways, now he’s flying this 16-year-old he met on Myspace to his house. I think I’ve turned him. Not gay. As in, to younger girls.

Okay, that was all pretty fucked up right? Now, who were/are these guys? I asked around a few men and it transpires that none of my friends are paedophiles, or they won’t admit to being one anyway, however I did come across this.

Charles

Are you a paedophile?
If I was a paedophile I wouldn’t tell you, but I dated a 20-year-old pikey when I was 14 and a 24-year-old when I was 15.
Somehow paedophilia is totally okay for women, how did you manage to get into a 24-year-old’s pants at 15?
Either I was devastatingly attractive or she was emotionally damaged. Or both. Probably both.
Did she know how old you were?
Yeah I went out with her for four years or more.
Four years!?!
Yeah and the 20-year-old before that was already divorced. All I can remember doing with her is speed and sex. She got done by the RSPCA in South London for cruelty to rabbits after we split. She’d bought rabbits to win me back, but I would not be won.
You had your eyes on a 24 year old.
Exactly. She was way cool. When she heard, the pikey girl hit me with a table and tried to batter me in front of a pub in Kilburn and then pretended to have a panic attack. She had too much testosterone apparently. Medical Fact: Testosterone turns women into sex-obsessed psychos. To be honest she was a means to an end, I left home when I was 15, so I put up with her shit so I had somewhere to stay.
Fair enough. Did you ever think it was wrong?
No. Not even once. But personally I wouldn’t go out with anyone more than 5 years younger I think. I mean, what the fuck would we do? I’m too old to have sex ten times a day and spend the rest of the day injecting speed.