Gen Z Men Are Too Afraid of Going Viral to Date

If you scroll on TikTok, you’ll likely see quite a few videos of women recounting their dating stories like it’s some sort of reality TV show. Some of the accounts are horrific, while others are merely frustrating. Sharing your dating sagas might seem like a cathartic, empowering feat, but it can also be damaging, inviting unsolicited, ill-informed, and even sending hatred to innocent participants.

For example, let’s say a woman goes on a date with a man she met on Hinge. She does the typical “get ready with me for a first date” TikTok video, sharing details about her match and the restaurant they’re going to together. She posts the TikTok, then heads off on the date.

Once she returns from the night out, she notices thousands of likes and hundreds of comments asking for post-date updates, which she happily provides. In fact, she goes into great detail about the many mishaps that occurred with Hinge man, from him spilling his drinks all over their food to their awkward goodbye hug. 

While these small anecdotes might seem harmless and even relatable, as the other person involved in the story, it can be discouraging to have your most embarrassing moments discussed publicly with random, savage strangers—so much so that you might choose to opt out of dating altogether.

Gen Z Men Are Turning Down Dates for Fear of Going Viral

Look, social media platforms like TikTok can be an incredible outlet for people to open up and gain a sense of community. In my opinion, there’s nothing wrong with sharing your personal experiences online in a respectful and empowering manner.

However, if you’re simply making fun of someone who has genuine intentions and is simply trying their best in the dating world, well, maybe go a little easier on your prospective partners. (This goes for everyone, not just women!) You never know the impact it might have on a person.

For example, I recently stumbled across this commentary piece on Rolling Stone, which explained how Gen Z men are too afraid to date because they don’t want to be filmed.

“Last year, a friend from another school was filmed in his attempt to ask a girl out in the hallway. Even though it was awkward, he didn’t do anything crazy in the video, and it was mostly just a rejection. But someone recorded him and posted it on a Snapchat story,” writer Eli Thompson reported in the article. “The video had the caption, ‘Bro thought he had a chance,’ and over 200 people saw it by the time he got to lunch.’”

“For many young men my age, these moments aren’t just embarrassing; they change how we date,” Thompson, who graduated from high school earlier this year, continued. “The possibility of being recorded and mocked has made what would be normal interactions feel risky.”